Some Guys Will Never Learn
May 1st, 2008 by Kaleb Nation
![]() |
WHAT THE (SNORT SNORT) IS WRONG WITH YOU! ARENT U SUPPOSED TO BE SOME SORT OF A GUY OR SOMETHING CAUSE U SURE ARENT LOOKING LIKE ONE READING A BOOK LIKE TWILIGHT! I RED THE FIRST CHAPTER AND IT WAS SO STUPID I WANTED TO BURN IT AND I MAY STILL DO IT! MY GF TRIED TO MAKE ME READ IT SO I JUST DUMPED THAT (SNORT SNORT) BECAUSE REAL GUYS... (SNORT, SNORT, OINK, SNORT).. YOU (SNURGLE)! WHAT A (OINK)ING (SNORT)! MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T READING TWILIGHT YOU WOULD HAVE A LIFE YOU (SNORT)HOLE (SLOP SLOP)! OH AND YOU WRITE LIKE A (SNORT) SO EVERYONE WILL HATE YOUR (OINK)ING BOOK!!! GET SOME (SLOP)S AND STOP REDING THAT STUPID BOOK TWILIGHT!!! GJ |
(Sorry, some words were lost in translation
but I just had to post it. Next chapter early tomorrow!)
Posted in Farm Animals
Email This Post To A Friend

May 1st, 2008 at 4:37 am
what a d(snort)bag
Who cares - your awesome for reading it Kaleb!..I’m still trying to convince my guy friends to read it so well done
May 1st, 2008 at 5:10 am
Well Kaleb, that guy is just and IDIOT! You’re the most awesome guy I know, who is brave enough to tell the world that he read’s Twilight:)
May 1st, 2008 at 5:52 am
Kaleb, marry me.
Well, I bet he wishes he was half as funny as you are, but not everyone was born with the gift of intelligence and open-mindness.
Keep the idiocy, GJ! You’ve messed with a furious Twilight-fanatic mob.
May 1st, 2008 at 6:51 am
His illiteracy and arrogance is quite amusing. He spends time commenting something he probably doesn’t care about for his own amusement, so don’t even bother listening to such a pig! Your website has broaden new angles and gives support to an amazing piece of literature, so just keep your head up. I look forward to see your comments on the next Twilight chapters, they seem to brighten my day just a little bit.
May 1st, 2008 at 8:14 am
How dare this (snort)ing (snort)hole say something like this?! Don’t listen to him! If he don’t like Twilight, he shouldn’t visit sites about it!
You are a funny guy and he is just jealous about the fact that so many girls like you!^^
He will never get a girlfriend again b/c he’s so stupid!!!
May 1st, 2008 at 8:19 am
HA!
Kaleb, you obviously have an incredible sense of humor (as we’ve already seen in your previous posts), but now we know that you can easily shrug off the misspelled and grammatically incorrect rants of guys who take the time to make ridiculous (but curiously heated) comments about a book that is apparently so stupid that people want to burn it.
Thanks for breaking the mold and giving this excellent piece of literature a chance!
We love being able to follow you on your journey! Looking forward to hearing from you again soon…
May 1st, 2008 at 8:35 am
I once read a fanfic description where the author warned, “Flames will be laughed at with friends.” In this case, I think this flamer is being laughed at by TONS and TONS of Twilight fans!
Kudos to you for shrugging off the stupidity. ^_^
May 1st, 2008 at 8:47 am
Well someone didn’t wake up on the right side of the bed did they…
May 1st, 2008 at 9:34 am
Kaleb… Can you please give us fan’s his email address? we are good at behaving like a mob
We could easily hunt him down!
(ask MTV about the cameo reaction and MSN about the Stephenie “miller” incident or even slashfilms when they called us all teens.)
May 1st, 2008 at 10:05 am
Hi Kaleb! Its good to know that you get feedback from the most educated, well spoken men. Like all good jokes, he really made me laugh. Hard. AT him. Keep up the good work. We appreciate YOU!
May 1st, 2008 at 10:06 am
Kaleb, don’t listen to him your a wonderful man for reading such an amazing book, and you will better yourself by learning from the all fabulous Edward (my love). He should be more careful about posting anything horrible about Twilight, he’ll have a humongous mob at his door( if we only knew where that is). So keep reading. I love your site, and my brothers is reading the saga also, and he likes it as well, he’s almost to Eclipse.
May 1st, 2008 at 10:13 am
haha!
Well, isn’t he an angry little man.
Wow.
It’s such a shame that some guys can’t get past their selfish pride to enjoy a good story.
Look forward to seeing the next post. Thanks for making us all laugh!
May 1st, 2008 at 10:23 am
He might be the big manly man trolling you, but which one of you has hundreds of girls checking out his blog every day?
May 1st, 2008 at 10:33 am
I must say I think it is awesome that you are reading the book!! The guy that sent this to you is just a loser!! Hope you are enjoying the book =)
May 1st, 2008 at 10:45 am
Haha, that was funny. That guy is REALLY insecure. A guy like that will always get laughed at, while a guy like you…well, i think the above comments make it pretty clear: women want REAL men, not snobbering little babbies.
Oh yes, and i agree Magpie; could you please send his email address?
May 1st, 2008 at 10:45 am
well.
he seems to be upset.
i think he was the one that got
dumped over a book.
ba ha ha ha.
serves him right.
i love the fact that you’re reading the book. it’s great.
go kaleb.!
May 1st, 2008 at 10:49 am
Well he was a *head. Well Kaleb, I am happy that you are not a stupid guy like him. He was an even bigger jerk emailing you that. Keep up the reading, and I hope that you enjoy it very much.
p.s.
I think that GJ’s girlfriend should dump his stupid self.
May 1st, 2008 at 10:55 am
Hahahahahaha, amazing! I feel sort of guilty laughing at things like this. I mean, I’m sure they meant to make a difference and didn’t mean it as a joke, but, really? Too funny.
May 1st, 2008 at 11:05 am
This guy has some serious issues. But whatever, that’s his problem, right? =)
We all love the fact that you’re reading this book!
You’re amazing Kaleb! & I love your sense of humor
May 1st, 2008 at 11:11 am
Pure Comic Genius. Graphic and all.
May 1st, 2008 at 11:20 am
wow I am so glad that guys like that (who sent that delightful comment to Twilight Guy) are left in the world for girls like me to pick as potential boyfriends… see the vast choices I am left with? *rolls eyes*
May 1st, 2008 at 11:29 am
Geez who’s this creep think he is? If you wanna be reading Twilight, that’s your choice! Haha, good point, Amy, about the hundreds of girls
May 1st, 2008 at 11:38 am
My jaw dropped in astonishment at that pathetic excuse for an email. For someone with such a luck of intelligence I’m surprised the boy (let’s call him illiterate fool shall we?) managed to get a girlfriend in the first place. Where as here thousands of girls visit the Twilight Guy eager for the next rambles of a Twilighter-in-making. Keep up the good work. =]
May 1st, 2008 at 11:38 am
I see you’ve met the “twi-haters” . . . LOL! Yes, they are out there but fear not for they are quickly becoming the minority! Especially with people like you popping up!
May 1st, 2008 at 11:42 am
Well…I think his intelligence was made perfectly clear by his lovely use of grammar and spell check…some people will never learn.

Keep at it, Twilight Guy. Your musings are intelligent and witty.
May 1st, 2008 at 11:53 am
a guy that dumps his girl friend when she makes him read a book isn’t a guy to, SO THERE.
lol, I love it how you placate haters. it’s hilarious how you make fun of this! XD
May 1st, 2008 at 11:55 am
WOW, some people have no class. What a jerk. And I totally agree with Amy!
May 1st, 2008 at 12:21 pm
OMGSH!! what an idiot, don’t listen to stupid neanthertals like this one, I enjoy and love your site. I bet his idea of a date includes bopping a girl on the head with a club and dragging her to his cave by the hair. stupid macho unsecured guys, they believe that they have prove their masculinity every minute of the day. I loath guys like this.
May 1st, 2008 at 12:38 pm
wow. what a jerk. He’s definitely insecure…..
May 1st, 2008 at 12:57 pm
Hahaha. Well, wow, I definitely wouldn’t be offended by someone who said they “red” Twilight.
Keep it up - I love hearing what you have to say!
May 1st, 2008 at 1:02 pm
It’s quite funny if you think about it. He’s not MAN enough to read the book so he’ll bash anyone who has the guts to read Twilight.
Overall very funny and very entertaining.
and by the way….. you rock Kaleb and I’m glad you don’t listen to idiots like that. ^_^
May 1st, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I don’t think I need to say much more than what has already been said, ditto. LOL. All my love for being a guy reading twilight and having an honest perspective vs. not even finishing it and ranting about how bad it was. My friend and I are starting a myspace and pod cast not just about squealing like a couple of little girls about the books and movie but about observing the book from a literary point of view, as we are both English majors. We will be comparing the books to other famous pieces of literature and a few other things. We will be opening our site and starting our podcasts next week. I hope you take a look at it I will post a link asap. Have fun with the next chapter!!
May 1st, 2008 at 1:30 pm
its actually sad how he took the time to write that. its crazy how ppl let the littlest things get to them. my 2 cents, he needs professional help
May 1st, 2008 at 2:12 pm
lol…how ironic. Starts the letter with “dear Kaleb” then goes “snorting” everywhere.
this guy needs serious psychiatric help. Kaleb, you rock for reading Twilight!!
May 1st, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Wow. I think that’s all that needs to be said. And I totally agree with Meg about the level of his intellect. You don’t have to read Twilight (though you should, if you want to amount to anything in life) but you do need to learn to speak (and write) using proper English.
May 1st, 2008 at 2:17 pm
What did Msn and slashfilms do? I didn’t hear about that one…
May 1st, 2008 at 2:23 pm
Spell check anyone? I’m glad you’re making light of this Kaleb because it really is hilarious, and ridiculous. Jealousy is an unattractive thing isn’t it?
May 1st, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Hmm…he says you’re a bad writer, yet misspells half the words…interesting. This guy sounds like he has real class
(snort snort)
May 1st, 2008 at 2:43 pm
Hahahaha that’s so funny! That guy is just jealous cause now you have something to talk to a 6 million girls about
May 1st, 2008 at 2:45 pm
“What the (snort snort) is wrong with you?!”
…..bahahahahahaha. i about died from that. Wow. That guy is an idoit. I find it very manly that you are a…man who is admitting to reading Twilight and loving every minute of it. Great job! And keep reading! It gets sooo much better!
May 1st, 2008 at 3:18 pm
You know what they say about when you point a finger, there are three pointing back at you? I pity him. I guess he doesn’t realize that someone who rites lke tihs doesn’t have enough credibility to offend anyone.
May 1st, 2008 at 3:39 pm
Wooooow. Seriously? Is he serious?
I’m sorry, please excuse me, I have to laugh a bit at that.
Good thing you know how to take a good joke, because that must be a joke. Are there people like that who really exist!?
May 1st, 2008 at 4:12 pm
Haha,
All I have to say is…Will you marry me?
May 1st, 2008 at 4:21 pm
ill read your book!
that guy has problems i cant believe he has a girlfriend and knows how to read…
your like my 2 hero next to Stephenie of course!!
May 1st, 2008 at 4:24 pm
that guys just a idiot if he thinks the books so stuped then why douse he read a blog about it?
I think your great for reading twilight and your writings great I love reading your reactions to things in the book.
I’ve tried to get some guys to read twilight but they wouldn’t do you have any tips?
May 1st, 2008 at 4:28 pm
okay, so if this guy hates the book so much, how does he know about this website??
sounds like someone likes the book more than he let on.
May 1st, 2008 at 4:49 pm
wow that guy is an idiot. other than the fact he said he wanted to burn twilight, he cant even write the word reading. he wrote “reding”! Reding? no. and anyone who says twilight stinks has to read the whole book first. nothing important happens in the 1st chapter that has anything to do with the remainder of the book. and your book will be great Kaleb..don’t worry about that obnoxious pig-no pun intended.
May 1st, 2008 at 4:56 pm
oh and I bet he didnt even get passed the first page of the first cahpter
My impression of whoever he is:
“In the OLY..olympi…Olympic pennin?…peninsula….ahh too many big words!” *turns to girlfriend “why did you just try to kill me with big words? your getting dumped!!!”
May 1st, 2008 at 5:06 pm
What an idiot. I like how he cares about guys reading Twilight. He needs to learn how to spell.
Kaleb, I think that it’s extremely hawt (yes with a “aw” in it) for you to be reading Twilight.
May 1st, 2008 at 5:12 pm
wow what a effin a-hole…. He really needs to understand that a majority of society is obsessed with these books (best books ever written in my opinion) and that if he disses the book there WILL be people after him…… i think that u-kaleb are a REAL man for trying to understand what we (twihards) are so dazzled by…. you reading the books proves a point….. there are real men in society and thats what us girls really want, someone understanding….keep up the good work reading twilight…..just ignore the dumba’s who send you crap like that one dude did..u know u r so much better than him….he needs serious help….
May 1st, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Ariana!(48th comment) I pretty much just laughed my pants off! hahaha, holy crap, i’m still laughing!I believe that was the funniest comment i’ve ever read.
May 1st, 2008 at 5:16 pm
Hahaha, in a way, guys who read Twilight are like guys who wear pink shirts….Lol, only the manlyiest men will read Twilight..<3
May 1st, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Erm…. His words are quite brave and macho, but did anyone else notice that he decided to leave his comment with only his initials? Sounds like someone can dish it out, but is quite a pansy about taking it.
Kaleb, you are the Anti-Pansy.
May 1st, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Wow. Aren’t you feeling the love Kaleb. He seems to adore you!
Keep at it! Your perspective is very interesting! You Rock.
May 1st, 2008 at 5:49 pm
Wow, that guy is so dumb. Kaleb, you are awesome I think it makes you more of a guy because you read twilight. plus your funny too, I promise I’ll read your book when It comes out. Hes just jelous that you are so popular
May 1st, 2008 at 5:51 pm
LOL @ Ariana! bwahahaha… Go on with your bad self Kaleb - WE LOVE YOU! Can’t wait for your report on the next chapter!
May 1st, 2008 at 6:12 pm
I hate to be crude, but to put it frankly: he isn’t getting laid because he didn’t read Twilight.
Also, more than 50 comments have been left insulting him, and there oodles of Twilight fans rallying around you, Kaleb.
Huzzah for intellect and creativity on this website. Opposite of Huzzah because I think that piggy education needs more funding.
May 1st, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Haha! Well, I’m not quite sure how one can “red” a book.
Silly me, I thought you were “reading” it.
;]
Well, his loss. He probably just got upset after reading the first chapter because he couldn’t figure out what all the big words meant.
XD
Enjoy your “red”!
May 1st, 2008 at 6:35 pm
hahahahahahahahahahahaha omg! that guy is soooo stupid. im acutally getting my mom’s boyfriend to read it…
*happy dances* now he can finally understand why im soooo obssessed! and how can you ‘red’ a book, last time i checked it was a color not a verb… well, im glad that your not one of those freaks who think that!!
<33 dani cullen
May 1st, 2008 at 6:57 pm
omg!
ROTFLMAO @ Ariana (alice)
I had to come back to see the twilighters response to this idiot pig and I read that comment. I almost fell off my chair in hysterics XD
May 1st, 2008 at 7:02 pm
My goodness. Kaleb, it’s Greg here again. I think someone here is a little bit bitter. He doesn’t realize how much he can learn from Edward Cullen.
And I love his spelling skills. They are quite amusing, no? Ah… I just can’t believe that he would completely miss the obvious here. Girlfriend = trying to bring him into her life, because she’s not going to ditch Twilight for him. (Who would, the (snort)hole.) So he goes and dumps her, and then sends a message to a random guy on the internet who is writing a blog about the book? Yes. Someone is bitter. Very bitter.
I’m bitter, too. But that’s because I lost my soccer game. - GS
May 1st, 2008 at 7:02 pm
…time to fry some bacon?

May 1st, 2008 at 7:07 pm
Lol Ariana that was hilarious!
Did you just try to kill me with big words? hahaha
As for this guy, he is an insucure idiot. I doubt that he even had a girlfriend! And i also doubt that he dumped her. If any guy i know said anything bad about Twilight, the next thing you would here would be his head hitting the floor. I cant hurt this guy, unfoutunatly, so can u pleeesee give us his email so we can murder him with hate-mail??
-Morgan
May 1st, 2008 at 7:14 pm
NOLA—i do have a certain craving for pork
I think burnt to a crisp is good, no?
May 1st, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Hahaha! That was freaking hilarious. Oh gosh I wish so much that they would replace expletives with pig noises on tv.
May 1st, 2008 at 7:49 pm
THAT ****ING ******BAG!!!!!!! HE CAN JUST GO TO **** AND KISS MY ****ING ***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HOPE HE IS FOREVER TORTURED BY THE FANGIRLS HE HAS ANGERED!!! AND WHAT THE **** IS WITH HIS SPELLING!? RED? ITS SPELLED R-E-A-D YOU IDIOT! YOU **** *** YOU HORRIBLE JERK!
Okay I got that off of my chest….. I want this guys e-mail though… I wanna nag him about his spelling, then yell at him. I mean O.M.G. I’m in rabid fangirl mode right now! That girl he dumped deserves a lot better. Jesus, I’m so mad!
But anyway, Kaleb, you are amazing. Just keep in mind, girls love guys who read romance, especially Twilight. This ******bag is dead wrong. Guys become men when they read romance (once again, especially Twilight) because they can finally learn a little on how they need to treat women! Edward Cullen is a perfect teacher for all the guys out there!
May 1st, 2008 at 7:57 pm
What an uber-toad! I hope that some of the Twilighters from the previous post find him…
May 1st, 2008 at 7:58 pm
:O
We should all gang up against this guy!
BWAHAHAHAHA!
And roast him… he is a pig anyway… YUM PORK.
LOL.
May 1st, 2008 at 7:58 pm
HAHAHA! I’m laughing at all the requests for his email address. I wouldn’t be surprised if he comes back begging me not to give it out
@ Nola up there, who wants to start frying bacon. HAHA
–Kaleb
May 1st, 2008 at 8:05 pm
HEHEHEHE!!! What a dirt ball! Kaleb, you rock and I’m glad you can laugh at stuff like that. Of course it probably would have been more effective if he could even spell. I find it interesting that he actually took the time to find your site and send you the email though. I’m thinking the girlfriend dumped him when giving him the book showed her just how big of an (oink)hole he is. Keep your head up Kaleb. We love you. As for this jerk…pig roast anyone? Here piggy piggy piggy.
May 1st, 2008 at 8:27 pm
Hey Kaleb!
I have to say, that made me laugh quite a bit! You’re right, some guys will really never learn *sigh*
My personal favorite:
“YOU (SNURGLE)! WHAT A (OINK)ING (SNORT)!”
Somebody needs to watch their language… lol. Thanks for keeping us all entertained with your adventures in Twilight! Have fun reading!
- Michelle
BellaAndEdward.com
May 1st, 2008 at 9:00 pm
Wow! Some guy actaully wrote that what a jerk cussing is bad!
May 1st, 2008 at 9:02 pm
Ha ha! That just made my day!
May 1st, 2008 at 9:05 pm
That was amazing! Totally made my night =) It takes a real guy to read a book like Twilight.
May 1st, 2008 at 9:05 pm
All I have to say is that… wow. Um, what is a guy like that doing on this site anyway? Hmmm… He’s obviously reading it secretly and loving every word of every chapter. What a (oink)bag. Kaleb, you’re amazing, and you entertain me, which is great. Whenever I see a guy reading Twilight, or if I know that he’s read the series, my respect level rises like 60%. There’s this guy at school who calls me Priscilla Cullen every time he sees me because last month or so I saw him carrying a Twilight book and approached him. I asked if he’s reading it, and he said that he’s read it about seven times already, and that he absolutely loves the series. I was like.. wow. That’s amazing! I asked to see his book and he had written all over it. Things like “vampires rock” and “edward<3bella”.. He was a little embarrassed, but I told him that my book was written on too, except with things like “Edward Cullen<3Priscilla Cullen”, “Edward is sexy”… So yeah, I’m done rambling. Keep on reading, because trust me, that guy is into it. Really into it :]]
May 1st, 2008 at 9:17 pm
That was probably the greatest comment/review thing I’ve ever read. Hilarious.
I propose a feast! A potluck, really. We all bring things for a picnic style luncheon.
Problem is, we need meat.
…
I think you’re all thinking what I’m thinking.
Up for hunting, anyone?
But honestly, that would be scary. I just finished reading Lord of the Flies - good book - so hunting pigs is not on my agenda.
It could, however, be on yours.
Priscilla - brilliant story. I like that guy at your school. I would love for someone to call me Joanna Cullen.
You know what’s crazy? There’s a guy in my class named Jasper. I almost DIED when I learned his name. First thing I said to him: “What’s your last name?” He responded with something generic, like ’smith’ or ‘Jackson’. *sigh* ….
On with the pig hunting!
May 1st, 2008 at 9:41 pm
Wow! Now that made him appear REALLY intelligent. Now ALL the girls will want him!
*throws “GJ” an English dictionary*
May 1st, 2008 at 10:00 pm
I like to think that I have good control when it comes to not resorting to violence, but in this one case, I think I could slip. You know, for the good of the world and all that jazz.
And GJ should be teaching the local Ebonics class. With language like that he could truly educate the youth of today.
May 1st, 2008 at 10:08 pm
wow. i dont think that guy understands that his ex (snort snort) girlfriend and plenty of other girls would kick his (snort snort) for saying that! notice that hes too terrified to let you post his name.
May 1st, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Amazing, I think my IQ dropped ten points from reading such trash. lol.
Pig roast, anyone?
Kaleb, you rock.
May 1st, 2008 at 10:48 pm
It is guys like that make girls wonder why we put up with all of the crap that guys do. Thank you for taking the time to read this book and for doing so with an open mind. If more people were able to do this with any situation the world would be a little more peaceful.
Oh,
And I hope you are finding these books are as good as we all think they are. I’m not sure how you are able to stop after each chapter, more power to you. I know I wasn’t.
May 1st, 2008 at 11:24 pm
AHAHAHAHAH
Oh. My. God.
Thanks for the laugh, that was really delightful. I think my favorite part was “red” and “reding”
honestly, what has to be wrong with someone to write something like that?
Good for you for sticking to your guns, man! You’ve definitely got (oink)s.
-Meredith
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:22 am
Sounds like this dude could learn a thing or two from Edward Cullen… Am I right??
Haha keep it up Kaleb whoo!
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:25 am
Um, for one…the guy should try reading a bit more often. The words that were not lost in translation were sadly misspelled. And for another, how did said pig boy find your website? Hmmm, me thinks he doth protest too much!
Keep up the fun blog. It has been a pleasure to read. Hopefully you do not become so obsessed (like other casual Twilight readers) that school and all other priorities do not get pushed to the side.
Stay focused.
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:57 am
Um, chya~
Carmen,have you even read his other blogs? Sorry, don’t mean to be rude, but he states quite clearly that he only reads like two chaps a week is because he’s staying focused on school.
*sigh* I know, i’m stupid for even commenting on it….*looks around, embarrased* Shouldn’t i have something better to do? Oh, heheh, i just realized that I am one of those obsessed, unfocused on reality fans! Should i get a shrink? *gets out the phone book*
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:02 am
*dial’s number from phone book*
“Um, Hi. Dr. Cullen? Could you pencil me in immediately? I think i need a reality check.”
*dial tone answers*
O_O
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:03 am
Yep. WAY too obsessed.
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:31 am
*hehe, the cullens must get REALLY good workouts….from running through my head all day long*
Am I high?
I should go sleep now. Staying up this late makes me so loopy……that means please forget all the above madness.
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:53 am
Sooooo…it’s early tomorrow, where’s the new blog???
*cracks myself up*
Wow, i’m a dork.
*minutes tick by*
Uh……..
*looks around, bewildered*
What was i going to do again?
…..
Oh yes! Sleep!
Yeah…sleep is good.
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:02 am
[...] have to be pig-headed and macho in order to keep your man card (we saw a perfect example of this yesterday). And some girls fall for it, even if it’s not really what they want: and when girls fall for [...]
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:33 am
OM(SNORT)G!!! WT(SNORT) with that (SNORT)?!!! HAHAHAHAH……… ok I can’t stop laughing. You made my day, seriously. I literally laughed out loud.
May 2nd, 2008 at 6:44 am
I was wondering why he wasted so much of his precious time to write this to you if he really didn’t like the book?
just men solidarity?
Go kaleb!
greetings from Italy!
May 2nd, 2008 at 11:26 am
Ironically, he cares enought about Twilight to find you site, and send a message
Happy Reading
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Kaleb as everyone else has said here, don’t listen to what he has to say. I think its great for you to reach out and read a book that has been read mainly by girls and that is clearly something that us girls like. Unfortunately for him, he now has just about the entire population of girls ready to kick his (snort oink)
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:45 pm
“I’m a terrifying ogre. You know, grab your torch and pitch forks!”
Yeah, in this scenario, he would be the ogre, and all of us Twilighters would be the angry mob with the torches and pitchforks…only he wouldn’t be cool like Shrek, so we would actually have to murderlize him.
–and Ariana with post #48, that was hilarious!
May 2nd, 2008 at 3:03 pm
This is the most comments you’ve gotten on a post!
lol you’re so hilarious! I love how you take such an ignorant persons jealousy, and turn it into a knee-slapper!
It’s great that you’re smart enough to not let all the negative comments get to you. Hoorah for Twilight Guy!
May 2nd, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Oh, and it’s SO obvious that you certainly DO have a life! You tell us all about it! If you didn’t have a life, you’d be done with Twilight by now.
Good luck with Math Final!
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:19 pm
What a flipping jerk…You are so awesome and your writing is hilarious(on your blog) and you are brave for actually reading these books publicly!!! I mean the are fantastic!!! So yeah he was a butt head and really illiterate…
May 2nd, 2008 at 6:00 pm
Even though it was really mean, I couldn’t help but laugh. You are awesome for reading this series & not being insecure to show that you do.
May 2nd, 2008 at 6:19 pm
ha. ha. ha. ha. that reminds me of one… two… seven… twenty… well, every guy except a select few in my school. it was funny the way you put it, though. no, it was hilarious.
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:56 pm
I don’t think i’ve ever seen someone so closed minded… what an idiot. you cant expect to get into a book in just the first chapter. i hate when people act like that. i have some pretty harsh words for him but im keeping my mouth shut, cause there wouldn’t be anything but snorts and oinks left to read because that’s all that would be voiced… just coming out in a steady stream. plus, there is no need for that kind of language. how immature. ill read your book, Kaleb. I hope if I get published you’ll read mine too!
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Wow.
Boys like this make God cry.
I have a feeling this guy drives a Hummer to compensate for something.
May 3rd, 2008 at 3:03 pm
haha
he thought he was being macho, but you’re the one with all of the girls flocking to your page every day
the world is definitely lacking really truly good guys. that one is proof. no, reading twilight is not a criteria for a good guy, but he is just a jerk.
thanks for being so cool and talented :]
May 4th, 2008 at 7:56 am
My question is…….why was he on your page in the first place if he hates twilight….hmmm…..
May 4th, 2008 at 10:59 am
ohh watever to him … trying to be all guy-ish, well, if he didn’t have any insecurity wid being macho, he wuldn’t be scared to read the book(mayb scared that his friends wuld make fun of him and call him gay)
aha wen i was reading that..omg he’s just very lucky i don’t noe where he lives… i was yelling and swearing at the computer(im not crazy=p) but still laughing at wat he had to say..he’s lucky that none of us Twilighters noe where he lives… ^-^
May 4th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
WOW!! That guys has a dirty mouth… But are you KINDDING ME!!?? Was an idiotic guy!! And what the crap was he doing on TwilightGuy page if he hate Twilight?? That guy is the one who needs a life!! Sending HATE mail… Yeah… Okay… That’s having a life…
Well Twilight Guy (Kaleb) I think it’s VERY brave of you reading Twilight and ACTUALLY telling people about it!! Hope all is well!! Good luck with the book!
May 4th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
whateva
he is soo wack 4get him kaleb cause ypu are funny and cool for readin twilight
May 4th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
I love reading this blog. That guy is stupid, talking about macho stuff.
He is the one who needs a life.
Guys can read Twilight. It doesn`t make you less macho.
Keep going1!
May 4th, 2008 at 6:13 pm
The fact that it doesn’t faze you at all is just awesome, Kaleb. Wheeeee!
I’m sure you’re as convinced about this as I am, but there are tons of guys who read the books and are completely and totally manly. Some people are just so BIASED against vampires and romance that they just can’t get past it! It’s hilarious!
Eagerly awaiting more updates…
May 4th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Ha! That guy should learn that everyone is in LOVE with Edward Cullen and the moment that he bashed the book, he lost any chance of having a girlfriend for the next five to ten years. He certainly doesn’t have one now.
That, and if he hated Twilight SO much, why/how did he find your lovely site? He either is a big enough loser to go looking for a good way to destroy his reputation or he really didn’t hate the book all that much. ^^
May 4th, 2008 at 8:04 pm
He’s just jealous that you have tons of girls coming to your site and being like “Kaleb, you rock!” and he doesn’t even have a girlfriend anymore (I bet his girlfriend dumped HIM because she realized what a pig he is). REAL MEN READ TWILIGHT!!!!!
Oh, and I agree with AJ (comment #110).
May 4th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
Oh, now that is indeed unfortunate. He gives guys a bad name. I frown upon that.
You, however, show that, yes, there are some decent dudes out there.
Be not discouraged, noble Kaleb. Thou hast the bravery of Beowulf.
May 5th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Maybe if he spent more time actually reading instead of trying to be his idea of what a “real guy” should be, he would know that “red” is a color and not the past tense version of the verb read. And speaking of real guys, my bf is 6-foot-6 former all-state all-star in both fooball and basketball, he loves cars, anything to do with sports, and read all 3 twilight books that are out so far and loved them. We can’t wait for the 4th. A REAL GUY wouldn’t write something so childish and idiotic.
May 6th, 2008 at 11:02 am
I only have three words for this guy:
WHAT A DORK!!!
He should learn to read, write, and speak properly before bashing anyone with his fabulous literary capacities. 8o/ (and his mother needs to wash his mouth out with soap — preferably Lifebuoy so he’ll get soap poisoning, for using such filthy and unimaginative language!)
Thank goodness for guys like you Kaleb! Keep up the good work!
May 6th, 2008 at 12:58 pm
PIGGIES?!?! DON’T LIKE ‘EM!
mwhahaa x
May 6th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Kudos to you, Kaleb. That’s all I’ve got to say, since all the other girls have said it all.
I personally think, that the poster there, is quite jealous of you.
May 7th, 2008 at 9:41 pm
dude I’d kick this piggy’s curly little tail if i’d ever met him. Kudos to you and all you do! know that we all back you up 100%
May 8th, 2008 at 8:54 pm
Edward does not exist. The pig up above can sometimes make us sad about this. Guys like you, Kaleb, make us realize that there are still worthy fish in the proverbial sea. Thanks for this, it made me laugh! Oh, and if you still have an opening in that angry mob, you can count me in.
May 9th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
u s***y ba****d!!!! how could u?! u have no sense in books! you are a hole, im telling u a hole. i hope u die in one!!!!!! insulted? i think so. i really admire kaleb for trying to read this book so u just shut the f*** up and go shove ur insults up ur dumb a**! i cant believe im wasting my precious time typing this, u son of a b****! i hope ur gf leaves u stranded on an island!
May 9th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
I think he’s secretly in love with the book and is just scared to admit it
hahaha. Love the snorts! That’s tooooo funny. Kaleb your awesome!
May 10th, 2008 at 5:47 am
hahaha!! Wow that was hilarious! Hope he enjoys being laughed at. But, yeah, I’m mad at him too. I really like that angry mob idea, and the roast pig one.
Ariana, you almost made me die laughing!!!! Too many big words!!
Kaleb, you’re awesome!!
May 10th, 2008 at 10:25 am
WHAT A MORON!!!!!!
May 10th, 2008 at 11:58 am
Another thing, I really do think it would be in the best interest of earth that you give me his email address. If you don’t, i will become a vampire and feast on any man with the initials “G J”. If you do give it to me, I will be a vegetarian vampire with only one exception.
May 12th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
That’s just rude! I think it’s awesome that guys read Twilight and definitly more guys need to be like Edward. Besides, Kaleb, your site is freaking hilarious. Me and my friends talk about it now at school and you definitly rock our socks!
May 14th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
well that guys intelligence level is shown in the fact he cant spell read! So don’t listen to anything that moron had to say! I would also like to point out that you probably get a lot more attention from girls than that guy ever will!
May 28th, 2008 at 5:56 pm
i love how he mispelled the word “read” this is why our teacher tells us not to drink or smoke anything!!
May 29th, 2008 at 1:05 am
[...] Our friend GJ sent me another email, filled with even more oinking. I am considering posting it. Keep an eye out [...]
May 29th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
What a (snorting)ing (snort)hole.
Ew… and he can’t even spell! I’m in the 8th grade, and I think I have a better grammar education than he does. You need to post the email– his stupidity humors me!
May 29th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
please post his next e-mail. and his adress(home and online) so we can pelt his house with rotten apples. JKJK anyway a guy who keeps sending you the wonderfully insightful emails has absolutely no life. if he is coming on this sight to bash you and twilight(gasp)then try to see if we can either report the little son of a (oink)or block him
May 29th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
That was so hilarious that it didn’t bother me at all. Kaleb, you are a genius, please continue your many witty talents. =]
May 29th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Please post his email! I know some girls who know some girls that have copies of Twilight we’d like to hit him with
jk keep up the awesome work kaleb, youre future gf (unless you have one already) will be completely smitten with your ability to not only read Twilight but LEARN from Edward! Way to go Kaleb! 
May 29th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
Guys an idiot. My guess is he had nothing better to do without his girlfriend. Guys who read twilight I personally think are more macho. Because they got guts. And even more guts if they admit. I actually got my guy friend to read it now he is hooked!
May 29th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
Oh ya forgot to say you rock dude, and any other guy who is a fan of Twilight.
May 29th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
what i find funny is the fact that he claims he hates twilight so much and thinks your an idiot for reading it, then why the heck is reading your blog about it? Better yet, why has he continued to read your blog and email you a second time?
May 29th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
DOn’t worry Kaleb….all girls are with you on this one…besides, that guys the idiot….i mean every girl would kill for an edward, and he refuses to learn…oh well, his loss…
May 30th, 2008 at 12:01 am
I’d like to remind the “pig”–a.k.a. most disliked man in the world for dissing Twilight–who has a fan-base of thousands of girls. Yes, that’s right, it’s the awesome, humorous, brave fellow who is reading a well-written book and giving an honest opinion with tasty bits of funny sprinkled on top.
Jealousy, my dear GJ, is not an attractive emotion.
No worries, Kaleb, you have me and the rest of the Twilight fans behind you!
May 30th, 2008 at 1:00 am
[...] last heard from GJ on the first of this month. Just so you know, he can’t sue me, because of the email policy. There goes GJ’s sole [...]
May 30th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
wow
there are some carzy haters out here…
May 30th, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Wow, what did ‘Twilight’ ever do to him? I think Mr. GJ needs to take a whole bottle of chill pills!
Plus, I doubt GJ will be getting any marriage proposals anytime soon (Sara’s post: “Kaleb, marry me.”).
May 31st, 2008 at 2:46 pm
Wow. It’s amazing this guy got past 1st grade if he can’t even spell “read” right. Then again, who says he did? Maybe he got left back fifteen times. Either way, he’s got some serious self-pity issues if he thinks he’s got to insult you to make himself feel better for being such a jerk.
May 31st, 2008 at 6:05 pm
LMAO!!! What a moron!!! He can’t even spell the word “read” right! I think your amazing for reading Twilight and hope that more guys read your blog and want to read Twilight!
May 31st, 2008 at 8:32 pm
Real dudes read Twilight… And I’m not the one that falls for the sensitive guys, but if I caugh