Reading New Moon: Chapter 5 (Cheater)
July 28th, 2008 at 12:05 am by Kaleb Nation
The song for this chapter is Memories by Within Temptation
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After all these months, though the pain of Edward leaving has turned into a numbness, Bella is still longing for something to fill the void. I can see it in her dreams, where she sees herself running, searching for something, only to find that there isn’t anything left to search for. By taking out Edward, as I said before, it is like tearing half of one person out. The emptiness in Bella has left her cold again, and it’s leading her to do anything, even buying a rusty, nonworking motorcycle in rainy Forks, to try to replace that feeling that she had before.
There is something very true in what Bella tells herself about Edward. How can he expect her to just go on and forget him, and act as if he was never there? Can anyone ever really forget someone they loved like Bella loved Edward, even if it ended years or decades ago? Memories like that are permanently kept no matter if you want to forget them or not.
There is a reason that sometimes grandparents or even great-grandparents can remember far back into their school days of who was in love with who and how they eventually met their spouse. Nostalgia like this, I’m assuming, is why Classmates.com gets most of their business; and some of us have probably even checked the Myspaces of Certain Special People from years ago, just to see how they are today (of course I’m not speaking from personal experience). Those types of things seem to stay in the back of your mind long after, because you can remember how happy you felt: and because of this, the memory of Edward seems to haunt Bella everywhere she goes.
Then, suddenly, Bella is distracted. The odd thing about this is that she hasn’t been distracted in quite a while obviously, and I just read the first page in the longest time that does not have something about Edward in it. I had to read it twice to make sure: not a mention of his name, not an allusion to his face or a stray memory of them before. And the funniest thing: Bella is driving to see Jacob Black.
Because of all the Jacob and Edward cries of allegiance, I know that Jacob will eventually become important in some way, so I’m already on the lookout. I found it very intriguing that the first time I see Bella distracted from thinking about Edward, it has something to do with Jacob Black. It’s an interesting twist.
I remember Billy Black as a slightly harsh man who Bella didn’t talk to much, because of his negativity towards Edward. Now that the Cullens have left town, suddenly Billy Black has a much more cheery demeanor. I see a future of Bella spending a lot more time over at the Black’s house. I also don’t think Jacob Black will mind that much, either.
Another thing that I’ve discovered about Bella: she seems to be searching for adventure. There are some people who just want some danger in their lives, and living in ‘boring Forks’ is not the best environment for people like Bella.
I laughed humorlessly to myself, still gasping for air. Reckless in Forks– now there was a hopeless proposition.
Hopeless Proposition
I’m assuming this is why Bella has a tendency to ignore regular guys (Mike Newton and the gang) and immediately go for the dangerous ones (Edward, etc.). Now that Edward is gone, the greatest (and most dangerous) thing in her life has gone as well, so she is left searching for anything that will bring adventure into her life again: even an old motorcycle
Something else I noticed: what is with the sudden amount of black bear sightings? I’m not exactly sure yet, though I’m sure I’ll be finding out that answer soon (or, that the bear sightings mean absolutely nothing at all).
——NOTES——
- For those of you who enjoyed my music before, I just finished a draft of a new song. I would really like any opinions on it. You can listen to it and comment over on this page.
- I hear that Bailey of NoMoreMarbles fame is going to be at the New York signing on August 1! She will be part of a panel with others from Twilight Series Theories, the Lexicon and other fansites. Everyone go say hi to her for me, and while you’re at it, they’re holding a contest for a poster signed by all the Twilight people who were at Comic Con! Check out this page for more info.
- Thanks to you, my channel moved from #17 this week in Youtube Partners all the way to #10! Thanks so much.
Posted in New Moon
Tags: Kaleb Nation, New Moon, Stephenie Meyer, TwilightGuy
July 28th, 2008 at 12:17 am
Black bears, eh…You’ll find out soon enough!!!
Lovely song, also!!!
July 28th, 2008 at 12:28 am
Hi, Kaleb la, I am sorry that your fans give you so many spoilers. I HATE spoilers, because they take away that element of surprise that everyone has as much right to as anyone else. Rant finished.
July 28th, 2008 at 12:39 am
Oh hahaha…the “bears”. They mean something, that’s for sure. It’s interesting what you said about Bella “searching for adventure”. Bella didn’t just go out looking for danger because she was bored. She went out to find something dangerous to do because it would defy what he had promised to Edward; the she would “stay safe”. She felt that as long as Edward had already broken his promise never to leave her, that she could break one or two of her own.
As you keep reading, you’ll eventually find out what consequences and “benefits” breaking her promise brings. ;]
July 28th, 2008 at 1:08 am
Shhhhh, don’t give too many hints, you two! We don’t want him gaining knowledge before knowledge is due. Keep reading. Kori’s right, You’ll find out soon enough!
Also, why do they get to see a real copy of Breaking Dawn before it’s out? Where do we get our hands on an AR copy? Five more days… Five more days… Five more days…
July 28th, 2008 at 1:08 am
eeek!
black bear sightings….well you’ll see about those…pay attention to the next chapters…look at every detail…you’ll see why…
July 28th, 2008 at 1:13 am
Good point of people not being able to forget the things and people in their life that they loved. When Edward said it would be as if he never existed, I didn’t see how that would be possible for Bella. He meant too much to her already. On a side note, I can’t believe how giddy I got over the copy of Breaking Dawn in the video. Oh man. Just a few more days!!!
July 28th, 2008 at 1:24 am
Hey Kaleb! I loved the “Reckless in Forks” picture!
Very funny!
I was reading your notes, and noticed that you questioned if there was a real copy of Breaking Dawn at :15 in the video.
It’s actually from the picture in the Twilight EW magazine!
Just thought I’d point that out!
You’re great!
July 28th, 2008 at 1:24 am
I see from now how interesting it will be to read about you analyzing New Moon as you go through it- because, in my opinion, New moon is involved with emotions, especially within Bella, so much more than Twilight. However, that is my opinion, only, and I look forward to your next post.
C:
July 28th, 2008 at 1:36 am
That isn’t a copy of breaking dawn at :15
it’s a picture from entertainment weekly
July 28th, 2008 at 1:39 am
I laughed like mad at that picture. Very perfect for what Bella is doing right now. It’s a shame that you’ve been spoiled as much as you have, ::glares:: but since you do already know I will say you are right – get ready for Jacob Black, and get ready for him in spades. Dude really is going to be around for longer than you’ll want him to be.
July 28th, 2008 at 1:48 am
I *gasped* and paused and rewound that video when I saw it yesterday too! Breaking Dawn is so soon!
July 28th, 2008 at 2:02 am
Yes, Jacob *is* rather important. XD Watch out for that dude . . . I know that there’re lot of dissenters on the topic, but I think that he’s one of the best parts of the series. =D
LOVE THE MOVIE POSTER. Grinning like crazy over here.
And rest assured that you are on to something as regards the bear sightings.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:03 am
Argh… I hate when people make comments here with spoilers :/
Btw, don’t you feel this very hope that Edward is gonna show up any minute? HAHAHA XD
July 28th, 2008 at 2:16 am
If that is a real copy….
Then I’ll be bargaining my soul to G4.
Lol at your movie poster. A+
July 28th, 2008 at 2:19 am
Kaleb, I seriously have checked your page more than I should just to see if you had a new post to share, I was getting ancy haha!
Anyways, I always like how you can pick up on the smallest, yet equally important details in the book. Keep going at it, and your humor always cracks me up =D
And how dare they tease us with a possible actual copy of Breaking Dawn!!! >O
July 28th, 2008 at 2:44 am
You guessed right about Jacob. Look out for him later, he’s just trouble, a story twist…
July 28th, 2008 at 2:50 am
Ah, it does look like a real copy ! Unbelievable
And great music choice, go Dutch bands ! 
July 28th, 2008 at 2:57 am
I don’t think Bella’s motorcycle is THAT old
where on heart did you get that picture from? 
July 28th, 2008 at 3:14 am
Hahaha…
The pic is very innovative.
Now this is just the beginning of Bella and Jacob’s relationship..
Keep on reading!
July 28th, 2008 at 3:43 am
“Reckless in Forks”–good title. Jacob. No comment. It does look very much like a real copy of BD or that’s just the cover.
July 28th, 2008 at 3:44 am
kaleb, you have officially made my day. Within Temptation is my favorite band and I love the song you chose from them. One of their best. (for future reference, The Howling is a good one for a big werewolf chapter and Bittersweet is just a really cute song). Nice post, i just finished reading this chapter on my 2nd time arround reading new moon.
July 28th, 2008 at 3:45 am
Haha, nice poster! I read the quote and then immediately thought of a movie for it too. Great minds think alike then?;)
This chapter was interesting for me too, even though it feels like it’s been a long time since I last read it (even though it’s been…less than a month). The shift towards Jacob felt unexpected even though we can’t expect Bella to just mope the entire time. The poor girl can’t possibly mope for the entire novel. Plus you’ll get to see what happens next – I really like your detailed posts.:)
July 28th, 2008 at 4:52 am
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July 28th, 2008 at 6:43 am
Great insight yet again! But I agree with Caitlin; Bella is seeking danger more than adventure. She wants to find that connection she stumbled on at One-Eyed-Pete’s. She wants to break her end of the promise. She’s not bored.
Now that she’s out of her zombie stupor, she is more emotionally vulnerable and that is what gets her in trouble. Her NEED (even stronger than her WANT) to hear Edward’s voice brings her more dependent on Jacob, who is anxious to please her no matter what.
July 28th, 2008 at 8:01 am
Love the movie poster
the bears come up later, you’ll see
P.S. i think the ending to new moon is my fave ending if all 3 books so far
July 28th, 2008 at 8:51 am
I will be at the panel discussion on 8/1… I will say hello to nomoremarbles for you…if I get close enough.
Lions and tigers and bears…OH MY…
July 28th, 2008 at 9:01 am
ohhhhhhhh spoilers!!
well I’m not gonna tell you any.
BUT ITS A COPY OF BREAKING DAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
July 28th, 2008 at 9:07 am
I liked this chapter because to me it felt like the first time in the entire book where we see Bella act like a real person. I also like the irony of how in her desperation to hear Edward’s voice she winds up tumbling into the life of another man.
Just always amused me…
July 28th, 2008 at 9:23 am
nice movie poster. This chapter is better, I agree. Bella’s going from one dangerous guy to another…
July 28th, 2008 at 9:25 am
It’s kinda hard to make jokes out of the chapters of this book, isn’t it? There’s not many things that can be construed as funny, and even if there are, it’s just so sad that you dont really *want* to. But the end is worth the whole middle of the book, dont worry.
and Kaleb, you should know by now that anything taht is mentioned by Stephenie has to be important.
Corinne!
July 28th, 2008 at 9:47 am
So perceptive! I wish I had the willpower to read these books one chapter at a time; then maybe I would have picked up on this stuff too. But no way am I even attempting it with Breaking Dawn! Have fun reading the next few chapters Kaleb, almost everything you mentioned in this post will be important.
Heehee…black bears…*shakes head* when you get to this, you’ll be kicking yourself for not seeing it sooner!
July 28th, 2008 at 10:14 am
I think thats not a real copy of Breaking Dawn, but A special edition of Eclipse with the cover flipped so it looks like it. Lol the bear sightings haha yes, they are important.
July 28th, 2008 at 10:15 am
oh you’ll find out about the bears soon enough.
July 28th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Black bear sightings?
Well, as it says in New Moon, you already know. He already told you.
July 28th, 2008 at 10:56 am
oh yes, the bears mean something. so does the fact that only jacb can take her mind off of edward.
July 28th, 2008 at 11:06 am
aw, the black bears…. it’s a Stephanie Meyer production so if they’re there, they mean something!
you hit the nail on the head about Bella being attracted to dangerous guys, but Jacob isn’t dangerous, yet.
-> Jamey and Caitlin’s post pretty much have the idea to a T.
July 28th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Reckless in Forks was brilliant…
However, the video, when I clicked the link was said to have been removed because of copyright claims by g4 Media Inc.
What am I missing?
July 28th, 2008 at 11:15 am
Once again, I loved your comments, especially the “Reckless in Forks” poster!
I’m so glad that you picked that song for New Moon. It fits so well, doesn’t it? Another one could be the song “Somewhere.”
Don’t worry about the bears thing, you’ll find out sooner or later!
Keep up the good work! ^_^
July 28th, 2008 at 11:21 am
The video with the possible copy of Breaking Dawn is down :/
July 28th, 2008 at 11:29 am
Loved the Poster. It must be difficult to make something funny out of this chapters. Glad you could.
Too bad people have spoiled you a little bit on the bears, I prefer your blog when you have no clue of what’s coming next.
July 28th, 2008 at 11:30 am
Sad day, the video got taken down? Should have checked your page sooner.
I’m glad you are getting so much out of the little things in the book. It will make for a better understanding further on. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read these book, finding something new every time.
July 28th, 2008 at 11:46 am
The video is not available anymore. Did it really show a true copy of Breaking Dawn? Did you mean “funny” funny? Or “strange curious weird” funny?
July 28th, 2008 at 11:50 am
Haha, I loved the poster!
And I just read your part in the newest Entertainment Weekly! Don’t worry, you gave good answers. =) I especially liked what you learned from reading Twilight. There is a lot of hope for non-vampires. =P
July 28th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
i wish i had a little more adventure in my life too…soo i cant blame her for being to reckless in those parts of the book. oh and kaleb…i cant watch the video becuz it says it no longer exsists! so maybe u could help me out on that..thanks!
July 28th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
I adore Within Temptation, good choice
July 28th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Yes! That was definitely one of a few within Temptation songs that somehow became my soundtrack while reading New Moon. Some of the others were Somewhere, Pale, Bittersweet, and Our Farewell.
July 28th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
I feel bad for the newer people being introduced to the Twilight series. By all the media hype and everything, there are spoilers everywhere and they just can’t avoid it. I’m glad that I bought Twilight the day it came out. Even though I had no idea what it was about, I am happy that I went through it the right way without any major spoilers.
July 28th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
After you read new moon I hope you get a good perspective of Edward and Jacob. Personally, I am team switzerland and want Bella to choose the one that she wants.
July 28th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
he he! This is gonna be fun to read about you reading New Moon. It is already.
July 28th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
I find it very funny even though a guy is reading twilight all of these girls find some weird way of coming here to discuss the books when it should probably be guys discussing the book here.
Anwways moving onto what you talk about in this Chapter her dreams actually have a dual meaning which you will discover if your an intelligent person. Secondly Jacob is probably my fav. char. from the book. Yes his part to play is huge in fact but everything you need to know about has been presented in the first book of twilight series.
Peace,
Justin
July 28th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
Your right Kaleb, no one can forget Edward Cullen! It’s too bad you didn’t start Twilight earlier, so you could be reading Breaking Dawn with the rest of us when it comes out. Keep reading, you’re doing great!
July 28th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Yeah, I don’t think Jacob will mind too much either.
I meant to ask you back in… Chapter 1, I think? What did you think of the phrase, “go OFF myself”? Do get the same feeling I do, that that’s a distinctly British phrase? I kind of wonder if Stephenie reads a lot of British literature and it slides over into her own writing. I do that myself.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
I think you are taking something the wrong way. I don’t believe that Bella is looking for adventure or purposely seeks danger because she likes it. She simply wants to break her promise to be safe. She may be a danger magnet but you make it sound like she is constantly seeking thrills and being reckless as part of her personality. I don’t think that is the case.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Bear sightings.
*giggle*
Jacob Black ruuuuuuuuuules the world….give him your mooooooneeeeeey….
July 28th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
*gasp* Black bears. Soon grasshopper. Soon you will know. *bows*
July 28th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
the link that you have in your notes doesnt work anymore! it says the video was removed
booooo
July 28th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
if you read quicker, then you will find out! :]]]maybe like 3 chapters a day?
P
July 28th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
the video has been removed… =[ sadness… i wanted to see it…
oh well! i hope you like the rest of new moon…. i didn’t particularly enjoy it, but whatever…
July 28th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
1. The song is great for the chapter. (As always you have the coolest taste in music)
2. Reckless in Forks. Ah, where do you come up with this stuff. That was genious.
3. I cannot wait until your book comes out. I am honestly curious to what it is about.
4. Even if a chapter is full of heartache you are still capable of putting humor into it.
5. Keep up the great work Kaleb [:
July 28th, 2008 at 3:32 pm
Hey Kaleb! I saw your bit in EW, it was so cool to have you in there
Hah, loved your entry, you see light in the darkest corners of New Moon
July 28th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Cant wait to see what you think about Jacob Black
July 28th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
Gasp! That video was taken off for copyright issues! Yikes.
July 28th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
very good music choice! I really am dying to read the next chapter
July 28th, 2008 at 5:56 pm
PLEASE READ FASTER theres nothing to do in the summer except read fan sites and wait for breaking dawn
:):)
July 28th, 2008 at 6:28 pm
No fair I didn’t get to see the video they took it off for copyright purposes but anyways don’t give spoilers. I mean come on nobody told me spoilers and I liked it that way.
July 28th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
One: I am completely in love with your music.
Two: I’m VERY excited to read your book.
Three: You’re going to enjoy New Moon.
Anyway, I’m about to go raid your other site again and attack your music. Like I’ve said before, I absolutely love New Moon, and I’m ecstatic about you reading it! I’m going to be rereading Eclipse these last five incredibly long days and possibly New Moon, too, but I can’t wait until you get to Eclipse.
By the way, don’t you DARE open Breaking Dawn until you finish New Moon and Eclipse! No sir, I will hunt you down and find a way to brain wash you. You may not do that.
It’s for your own good. You know we all love you. 
Anyway, I’m off to try to recover enough to go scream at the Bella Cullen Project concert tomorrow. 
July 28th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
You’ll find out the answer to the bear sightings soon enough. Just be patient and enjoy Jacob as he is while you can!
July 28th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
My family just freaked out because I screamed like a silly fan girl. You used the song I suggested!!!! *dances* This is THE theme song for New Moon in my opinion. It sets the mood for the entire story (from Bella’s perspective) and it is also incredibly beautiful. Once again… YAY!!!
July 28th, 2008 at 8:44 pm
i loved the “reckless in forks” thing! oh and nice old bike too! ur so funny
July 28th, 2008 at 8:50 pm
you just wait and seeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Oh, and the “Reckless in Forks” thing made me giggle. I can’t wait to see that one in theaters. For some reason (possibly the fact that Tom Hanks was in Sleepless in Seattle) I thought of “Forks Gump” right now (instead of “Forrest Gump”- which btw is an awesome movie! lol, ha! i can’t wait to see your reaction to what happens soooooonnnn! “Our lips are sealed” lol, obsessive twilighters and musicians tend to put songs to random statements, books, etc. ha.
July 28th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
BTW, I’d like to compliment you on your speed in reading New Moon! bravo, bravo *claps for Kaleb.* I can’t wait to see what songs you pick for the chapters too, and i hope that you decide to have us vote for a song to fit the book again (even though that’s a while from now). I have a few in mind *cough cough The Scientist* lol
July 28th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Oh one more comment! great interview with EW. I completely forgot about it (sorry, it was a busy day!) but then at dinner my brother was reading entertainment Weekly and say “Twilight” let me tell you, my head shot up as fast as a vampire is capable of doing. I love your answers, and I think that it made my brother believe me that there is a Twilightguy! good job Kaleb!
July 28th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Aaaah… the ‘bears’… you’ll learn!
Just remember to (and I can’t stress this enough) read the whole book, not just skim it, waiting for it to get good. It doesn’t seem like this is what you’re doing at all, but I made this mistake and missed a few key things… just pay close attention, because this is where it gets good!
July 28th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
It’s so weird for someone to mention the bears and not know what they are…for me that is. I mean I didn’t at first, obviously, but now that I know..it’s just….agh it’s so weird.
I love to read how you see the chapters. Again, it’s weird to read ‘what could be’ when you already know. And Meg Ryan with Tom Hanks in Reckless in Forks?? HAHA! I don’t really think that’s their ground..being from Sleepless in Seattle AND You’ve got mail n all.
July 28th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Oh I love it! New Moon is great.
Check out the song Near to You by A Fine Frenzy as you continue reading. It’s gorgeous and PERFECT for this book.
July 28th, 2008 at 11:28 pm
Lol. I laughed when you mentioned the black bears. Yes you will find out very soon. Hehe.
July 29th, 2008 at 10:41 am
When do we find out who won the CD? :]
July 29th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
You’ll find out about the bears soon^^
Great song. I love Within Temptation!
July 29th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
oh yeah, you’ll find out what the whole “bear” thing is about… There’s been freakin’ huge hunks of foreshadowing in Twilight… *cough* Whatever, you’ll find out. I think I figured it out by the next two chapters, I forget. Lol. I loved the “reckless in Forks” pic.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
WOW… LOVED the movie poster…
and yeah u will find out about the “BEARS”,,, but u need 2 pay attention on everything!!! cuz after reading NEW MOON a billion times u will c that they give u many details even before the bear situation happend! god im giving so many spoliers im gonna stop!
im mad cuz i only get 2 read BD the 6th cuz im in brazil till the 5th!
July 29th, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Loved the movie poster it made me laugh! And I just got my issue of EW- great interview!
July 29th, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Oh are you in for a suprise about the black bears!! *giggles*
July 30th, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Love the movie poster!
New Moon will start to get interesting after this, with Jacob Black in her life now..
July 31st, 2008 at 3:05 am
I’m really curious to see how you….see Jacob. His story is certainly interesting.
I’m dying to see how you gain an idea about Jacob in New Moon, only to have it flip in Eclipse.
New Moon is so vital to the entire series. Eclipse relies so much on elements given in New Moon.
Don’t skip over anything! New Moon is very, very important :]
Enjoy!
July 31st, 2008 at 4:04 am
jacob.. i love jacob he is very essential to the twilight saga, im only saying this because im guessing u already know.. i like reading your thoughts on each chapter because i like your points of view they are very interesting, the story only gets better and better, cant wait until you finish new moon!
August 9th, 2008 at 10:35 pm
God I love the song memories. Makes me want to cry
September 5th, 2008 at 7:28 pm
You say you’ve been spoiled as to… certain things about Jacob. I can’t believe you haven’t figured out what it’s foreshadowing!!
But seriously…
I figured it out already, with the same amount of NM spoilage as you have.
September 5th, 2008 at 10:41 pm
Jacob… *narrows eyes* Poor you, having to read about him. Hsss.
Sorry, I go slightly odd when it comes to Jake. He’s a jerk.
October 4th, 2008 at 11:24 am
well in twilight, didn’t edward and the cullens hunt bears? ..so maybe that’s why there’s a return since they left.
i’m pretty sure Bella won’t have any feelings toward Jacob.. i hope not, cause i LOVE edward
October 30th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Thats a bit strange. I have this song on my I-Pod too…
July 15th, 2009 at 4:55 pm
Regarding the first five chapters of New Moon (yes, I'm only just catching on – but going fast now!) I think Bella's sudden interest in reckless actions comes from two things:
1] indeed, wrestling with the fact that she promised Edward to stay out of trouble while there seems to be no real payoff for it anymore; at 'best', it keeps reminding her of him. Out of spite, or maybe as a desperate last resolve to lure him back – getting herself into such a total mess that he will nééd to come and rescue her again… Endless different motives intertwine here.
2] she has been numb for so long now, and the few feelings that wére there only made her extremely sad and lonely – surprised by finally feeling something else again, she's clinging on for dear life to that emotion and sensation, if only to temporarily escape from the living hell she's been going through for the past time. It's not about the exciting activity in itself, but about it being so different from everything she is and was before.
I must say, apart from the fact that it's just plain sad to see such loving characters separated, I was mostly baffled/flabbergasted by the description of Bella's state of grief and mourning. The absolute and utter nothingness, the frequent notions that she should actually feel, or do, or say, or think one thing or another – but all that's left is the screaming silent void inside.
July 15th, 2009 at 8:55 pm
Regarding the first five chapters of New Moon (yes, I'm only just catching on – but going fast now!) I think Bella's sudden interest in reckless actions comes from two things:
1] indeed, wrestling with the fact that she promised Edward to stay out of trouble while there seems to be no real payoff for it anymore; at 'best', it keeps reminding her of him. Out of spite, or maybe as a desperate last resolve to lure him back – getting herself into such a total mess that he will nééd to come and rescue her again… Endless different motives intertwine here.
2] she has been numb for so long now, and the few feelings that wére there only made her extremely sad and lonely – surprised by finally feeling something else again, she's clinging on for dear life to that emotion and sensation, if only to temporarily escape from the living hell she's been going through for the past time. It's not about the exciting activity in itself, but about it being so different from everything she is and was before.
I must say, apart from the fact that it's just plain sad to see such loving characters separated, I was mostly baffled/flabbergasted by the description of Bella's state of grief and mourning. The absolute and utter nothingness, the frequent notions that she should actually feel, or do, or say, or think one thing or another – but all that's left is the screaming silent void inside.