What R U Saying: I’m not as stong as emmet (or the jo bros)

"I'm not being mean, I'm just telling u the truth." Mmm....never thought the truth could ever mean incomprehensible gibberish

Oh my god this is so damn hilarious! The Jon Ass brothers! HAHAHAHA!
Damn that is really something else right there.
Very funny.
You rock Kaleb.

HAHAHHHAHAHAhahAAHAHAHAHAHAH
That was the stupidest shit I've ever seen!!!! The Jon Ass brothers!
HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH That was hilarious.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAAAAAAAAHAHAHHHHHAHAHHHAHAHAH

You know, this inclines me to wonder if the haters ever look back upon this site. You know, just to check if their illiterate hate has done any damage? Oh, what I'd pay to see the reactions of these people after reading that all of us (who have the power of spell-check and actually understand the properties of writing and grammar) mock their pathetic attempts at hate mail. Just a thought.

Keep the pincushions and pwns coming! :)
-Rachel M.

Oy vey, thats just scary... and horrifically painful. My IQ just dropped 10 points.Rofl, I feel an odd mixture of contempt and amusement at the human mind sometimes.

Oww that just destroyed at least half of my brain ! Seriously how the hell can someone be *that* horrifyingly bad at spelling?!?! plus the fact whatever it was she was saying made NO sense at all!
ugh now my brain is completely spoiled why oh why did they have to butcher the english language like that??
But thank you so much Kaleb for putting them up - made me giggle no end -Jon ass brothers *tee hee*

wow. that had so many grammarical errors i almost went blind
i love Jonas Brothers (yes thats how its spelled) but i wouldnt go to a TWILIGHT site to flaunt it
love your site. You have a good view on the world
congrats on the book

Wow. That's an epic failure on their behalf. the hate mail you receive is ridiculously hilarious. Keep em' coming! Those haters actually have a place in the world now.... other peoples' amusement.

Wow. Those people need to learn how to spell and write the english language! That plus their "arguments" make these hilarious! What goofs. I'm glad you can just laught if off Kaleb. And no matter what anyone says you are awesome and I love your site! I love reading your thoughts and insights on my favorite book series, you make me laugh & have great insights I never thought of before. Do we need to make a Team Kaleb now?

the hatemail is HILARIOUS!!!!!!! I dont understand y they even look at this website if they dont like it. u would think they would at least make sure that they spelled it right. i really dont understand these people who do stuff like that. its great that u can laugh it off though, kaleb. contrary to what the people who send the hatemail say, i absolutely love this website!!!!!! u r awesome!!!!!!!!!!

LOL XD i loves this hate mail.... man now i think i will send you some so that i could end up featured on your posts!
HAHAHAHA

Oh I needed a pick me up..
and that really made my day!

Jon ass brothers.., I fell like he or she is insulting the Brothers more than Twilight...,
I just cant believe people can be this stupid....

omg thats so funny that people are actually that stupid!!!!!omg just.......wow.dang those were hilarious!!!!!!lol

Is the first one from a Jonas Brothers fan? 'Cause they pretty much just insulted them by calling them the 'jon ass brothers' XD And the whole 'twilight sucks' 'insult' is SO old by now. I mean, if you're going to insult something, at least do it INTELLIGENTLY is all we ask! Of course, this reminds me of a group of girls who came up to me and my friends, and asked us to tell them a really big word to confuse one of their other friends. 'Simultaneous' was apparently a very long, very confusing word.
If I knew these people, I'd disown them. Or else teach them grammer and spelling skills.

Omg this is too funny Jon Ass brothers wow!!! Even a non English speaking fans should know how to spell their supposedly favorite band's name LOL

Plz keep these coming they're too funny!!!!

LOL
I don't even understand the first mail xD~
JoBros WTF?! Twilight is thousand times better! Even the JoBros want to be on the new moon soundtrack...(I'll kill them if they are on the soundtrack)

LMAO, that's so sad. Don't worry, we heart you kaleb! The Jonas Brothers SUCK. You're way better than them in every single way (:

haha
I love the jon ass brothers they're particularly assy
I don't see the point in the hate mail
It's not like you're going to suddenly say
OHH MY GOOD THEY'RE RIGHT I SHOULD JUST STOP DOING WHAT SO MANY PEOPLE WHO CAN ACTUALLY SPELL ENJOY READING I'M A SHAAAAAM
riiiight...

I could hire a professional translator, and he wouldn't be able to read the first one.

And the second one? Well, I'm kind of a jonas brothers fan myself. But the jon ass brothers? I don't know, man, I don't know.

Thank you for so graciously sharing those messages. Hahahahahahahaha, that was great.

Is that first one even written in English?

ohh man!!!! is all i have to say to that.
i had to seriously read that first one over about 6 times to get a little of what the heck they were talking about. bahahaha is that girl brain dead herself?

"jon ass brothers" wow thats some funny stuff!!
the real qustion is...is she a fan of the jon ass brothers? haha

dont worry about them kaleb. they are the ones who are seriously brain dead themselves for loving the joe bros over twilight. love yeah kaleb!!

I find your website insightful and that chic has some issues.

It took me a second to figure out she was trying to say 'brain dead' and not 'branded' lol. :) Dumb people make me laugh.

The Jo Bros are gay. Just sayin.

apperently the first person is brain dead...she was compairing to fictional characters...even tho they r all wut she explained, compairing u to guys in books is mental XD

and the jonas bros suck!!!

Haha i have no idea what the first person is trying to say i gave up trying to decipher it after my fourth time reading it.

"Jon Ass brothers" haha that may my day a lot brighter after reading it haha!!

Hahahaha!!!
"Jon Ass"
ROFL!!!
The 1st person might be brain dead herself :/

By the way I ment 'So' not 'Si'. My bad

Hello Kaleb,
Si I don't know if you're reading this, but what happened to the hatmail from the guy who wrote in all caps? I wanted to show them to my friend but couldn't find them. You should put them in this category. Bye now,
TeamJacobEdward

My 3-year-old speaks better English than that...Wow...I am speechless. I just want to say thank you for the laugh. It sounds like we would all like to read more hilarious hate mail. And, I don't see the 'jon ass' brothers with the kind of devoted fans of all ages that Twilight has.

heh. THAT WAS ME!
lol im just kidding <3
i love you too much keleb,
and the "jon ass brothers" sucks anyways :D

LOL!!
It's very entertaining!!
That's completely ridiculous!!
That made me laugh seriously!!
I like your Hatemail!!
:)

How can someone possibly write something as idiotic as that?!? It takes my BEST effort not to double-check my posts like 5 times! All you have to do is press the button in the web toolbar and it fixes it for you!

And even the English translation of that first one doesn't make sense! What do swimsuit models have to do with anything?

You should make a Wall of Shame like Mugglenet.com! I can spend hours just laughing crazily at the dumb things people post. Yours would be the most hilarious thing ever and would totally pwn Mugglenet's!

rofl!

I love the first one. "Brainded" for brain dead, I think and then I love how she compares you to the looks of the male characters, hopefully from the movie ... Because if she is pulling that from the look descriptions in the book....what?!!!

And the second one is just hysterical.

It cracks me up that in these examples you give us the writer assumes your trying to set yourself up as some guru or god of twilight. Wow, Kaleb, how have you hidden your overweaning self-importance from us your regular readers for so long that only the illiterate could spot it? ;)

i don't get it.
i just don't get it.
what the hell was the first girl even Saying?!?!

I wonder what the first person's definition of mean is? hmmmmmm that would be interesting to find out. Kaleb bring more HATEMAIL it is very interesting... and hilarious.

Captain sarcastic
Amelia

PLEASE ASK HER TO BE MEAN xD

oh and i love twilight AND the "jon ass" brothers. it's JONAS foo'!! :P

ahaha kaleb marry me please :)

Hmmm. Can you ask her to be mean?

Thank you for publishing the hate mails. They make me feel better about being me. It's like a big hug. Thank you!

A wise man named Albert Einstein once said, "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Keep 'em comin' Kaleb!

HAHA!!! LOL! CAN'T STOP LAUGHING KALEB!! that was so funny! You should totally post more, PLEASE!!!! :D

those made my day. Who can actually write likie that? do they know english? I am strangely disturbed by the fact that there are people that think that works when comunicating...
well keep them coming.

TWILIGHT 4 EVAR!!
hahaha.

Wow, sorry about the hate mail there. People are ridiculous.

Luckily enough I am not as big as you to get hate mail ;-)

At least it is something to get a laugh out of!

Keep up the good work Kaleb.

Wow! That was ridiculous...and hilarious. I'm surprised you even bother reading hate mail, there again, when you need a good laugh...

Actually, I'm wondering if it wasn't "brain dead" but possibly "branded" that she/he was trying to say....maybe something about labeling or stereotypes? It would help if it had some context!! What is she responding to so passionately and impatiently! Someone call Henry Higgins of writing and composition please!
Sounds like SHE is half brain-dead!!! just some angry little girl who grew up with a cell phone in her hand texting her mother what she wanted for lunch.

Keep up the great notes, I'm glad you are finally getting around to Breaking Dawn! tic toc tic toc....

Hahahaha.... Oh Kaleb, it's posts like this that makes you one of my favorites.

Speaking of 'brainded'...

Please, please post more of these! Hahhahaha.

Keep them coming Kaleb :D I love how there's absolutely NO punctuation in the first one so the sentences all kinda run together like the person was "brainDED" or drunk when they wrote it XD

oh wow lmao "jon ass bros?"

niice! totally made my night!! =D

Hahaaaaa I love this. Please keep em coming! What is that first one talking about? I don't get it at all. I did understand it better after reading the one commenter's translation. Jon ass might be the greatest thing I've ever heard. That made my day.

Wow...it took a couple of minutes to realize that brainded was brain dead, and not some new verb that the person was trying to make up.

Oh, and btw: I <3 the Jon Ass Brothers. :D

LMFAOOOOO. the person who wrote the second hate mail thing just made them self look retarded. ohh the irony HAHAHA

oh my god. this grammar is horrible.

Oh good heavens...I'm not even going to TRY to translate that; my brain might just atrophy if I do! As it is, my poor brain is scarred for life just trying to read it.

I wonder if they realize how foolish they look...probably not.

:D

i bet the people who sent him those feel really stupid now. well if they see it was posted and how many people are making fun of them that is. :D

Oh and I have a question. Why do people write hate mail? Especially to such amazing people (like Kaleb)? :)

Seriously, if you're going to insult someone, you should probably try to sound the least bit educated or have a good insulting remark, instead of using horrid grammar and writing something riddled with spelling mistakes. Those people made themselves look like dorks. Hehe ;)

Those were painful for me to read, really. I'm an English freak...so spelling mistakes and whatnot really bother me (and just for saying that, I probably spelled something wrong without realizing it. Oh well...it's just a comment. I don't really pay attention to my spelling on places like this).

Just when you think you have seen the epitome of stupid, someone pushes them aside. You rock!

Wow, I could feel my brain melting out of my ears reading the first one. I mean, "brainded", other various spellings of words and punctuation anyone? It doesn't take that much longer to write "you" instead of u. Seriously, but the second one is hysterical. :D

Can we say EPIC FAIL?

Wow.... They are dumb lol.... But I agree that Jones brothers one was priceless!! Wow, the first one wasn't even hardly making complete sentences! It sounded like she was high or something! Lolz!

no one could possibly no what the girl is ranting about!! none of it makes even the slightest bit sense! and the second one..thats just odd..if they liked the jonas brothers so much y did they call them the jon ass brothers??? i dont understand..!

Wow. That was absolutely delightful :) And don't worry, Kaleb. You are much more wonderful than the Jonas Brothers and the Cullens :) The Cullens aren't real...and the Jonas Brothers aren't very entertaining.

LOL!!!
ok i sort of agree with the first mail
'your not as mysterious and hot as edward not as stong as emmet not as amazingly sexxy as jasper or not as adventurous funny or drop dead gorgeous as jacob' but who is..
and you never said you were.. not than i can recall.. you're just reading the books and talking about it.. what is that girl ranting about??!?

alright now seriously though- its not their fault, they were obviously dazzled to the point of grammer-failitude by Kaleb's awesomeness (to the point of you needing to be refered to in the plural tense)

"jon ass" brothers! omg, epic!
I don't know who should be more insulted: you, the Jonas Brothers, or anyone unlucky enough to be named Jon Ass...

and for the record I really do think that if Twilight was about swimsuit models than we would indeed er, let you be the brainded morons you are, Kaleb. Because apparently you have so much awesome that you need to be plural? Or something?

HAHAHAHA :D Math Should die. Sorry I know that was random. People actually agree with my opinions thats funny no one ever agrees with a sarcastic person.( Or do they? hmmmm) Oh one more thing that i forgot to write earlier: What does this have to do with anything "u is because your not as mysterious and hot as

edward not as stong as emmet not as amazingly sexxy as jasper or not as adventurous funny or drop dead gorgeous as jacob"
i mean really what does it have to do with anything. Did Kaleb post something that made it seem like he thought of him self that way. If he did i must have missed it.

Again your sarcastic 13 year old,
Amelia

Seriously, if you are going to try and be rude, insulting, and make a point you have to at least make sense! And have perfect grammar to even be respected... And not to sound like a broken record of all these comments, but I love it-Jon ass.

HAHAHA oh my god that was priceless!!!
was that even english? why do people get all worked up about things like this. tehy should just go on living their lives, dude. to all ahters: NO ONE CARES WHAT YOU THINK

wow is all I have to say.. lol
Happy Easter Kaleb!!!

lol Thank you for the translation. I had to sit there and read the one from the girl (or was it a girl...?) word by word.

Ameila, I completely agree with you! Perhaps their teachers were tired of their attitudes and passed them. lol Sometimes I think that's the only reason I get through math. Honestly, I'm not a terribly mean person, but when someone (AKA, math teachers) messes with me, I tend to get a little... umm... upset.

With that, Happy Easter! =] And may math DIE! =] Now isn't that a happy note? =]

Ohhh And can i ask something to all you twilighters...* sorry its random* .

Did you guys see Stephenie in the film! Im sure its her. But i was like OMR Stephenie Is In The Movie That Totally Rocks!

Okay Sorry For Changing Subject As You Were. Lol.

Cya, Again,
Poppy xxxxx

AHAHAHAH
I don't get it, either!
My English epic failed....

urghh I Hate People Who Say Twilight Sucks, Some Of My Friends Used To Say It But They Hadnt Even Seen It Or Read It.

So I Got Them To Watch The Movie And Then They All Wanted To Read The Books :D I Conveted Them. Hehe. Now For The Boys!


Hate Mail Just MNeans That You Have Finally Got Enough Fans That People Get Jealous.

Instead Of Hate Mail You Should Put Jealous Mail. Lol :L

The Boys In My School Are Just Jealous Cause They Are Know Way Near As Fit As The Cullens Or The Werewolfs. :p

Cya,
Poppy xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Oh good golly that was horrible. I was cringing before I even started to read the "Hate" mail. Thank you Cyn for your translation but I still don't understand the point the first person is trying to make. And as for the second one, I have no idea how the "Jon ass" brothers tie into Twilight....Are these people trying to make fools of themselves???

OK I agree with everyone so far the first person doesn't know what they are talking about, and they can't spell. What do swimsuit models have to do with anything? And all females are brain dead because Kaleb Nation supposedly said that in his posts. Kaleb you are truly awesome and we all love you even though some of us won't admit it. The second post was just plain weird why do we have to put the Jonas Brothers in this anyways. I have to admit that i was laughing so hard that i had to stop myself from hyperventilating i mean "Jon Ass Bros" really.
IF YOU DON'T LIKE TWILIGHT DON'T READ TWILIGHT GUY GASP.
People really do need to retake their English classes. OH what has happened to education systems.

Kaleb we all love you. I am glad that you can write in perfect English (unlike some people snort)
on a happy note Happy Easter and a new year oh wait that is XMas.
From, a very sarcastic 13 year old Amelia

This is so funny, hatemail should become a regular feature.

I cannot for the life of me figure out what the significance of the swimsuit model thing was in the first letter.

And of course all of us Twilight fans are brainded cuz we dont lkie the jon Ass brohters. XD

Oh WOW! I can't even understand the first message and the person who wrote the second one needs to find a better argument!
LOL this is hilarious!

jon ass! lol! u shud post all the hatemail u get, cuz its hillarious!

Wow... the only thing i could do was laugh and laugh... hilarious.

jon ass.... lol

Ok, I agree that it was horribly written, but keep in mind that it may be foreigners. Not everyone is from a english speaking country (even if you guys like to think that)
I'd like to see you try writing french, if you're not used to it.


But if they were english speaking people, then they're pretty dumb***z

O.K. You are making girls look brain-dead. If there were swimsuit models in the book and you guys went around talking about it do you think we would make a sight about it? No, we would just let you guys look like the brain-dead morons everybody knows u are. And if you really want to know why this is probably happening to
you, it's because you're not as mysterious and hot as
Edward, not as stong as Emmett, not as amazingly sexy as Jasper, and not as adventurous, funny, or drop dead gorgeous as Jacob. So there. You have your answer, and no matter what you think, I’m telling you the truth and I’m not being mean either. If you want to see me be mean, just ask.

Woah, that was tough, and I doubt I even fixed all the mistakes. And even with my touch-ups, it's basically impossible to decipher.

hahaha thnks so much 4 posting that! the 1st person is an idiot! what is she even saying!?!?!

the second person is definatley right though

jon ASS

hahahaha thnks again Kaleb! :-D

"brainded?" FAIL.

Haha! Who knew hatemail could make a person's day?

Just simply LOL! [x

LOL!!!!!!
Thanks Kaleb...my day needed making :)

Kaleb, I'm dying here!!!!!!!!!!!!
You're my hero for posting these!!!!!!

Whoa there are 2 Janelles!

*waves at other Janelle*

Lol, some people...

Well, their the ones with problemes.

You rock Kaleb!

All I can say is WOW.

jon ass brothers? Was that sarcastic or did she honestly spell it wrong?

I can't even understand what the first girl is talking about? Where did the swimsuit models come from? lol.

And I fail to understand why people bother to write these anyway. Are they emails or actual mail?

OMG What the heck, i'cant even understand what was the first one all about, i just could laugh, and the jon ass bros thing, jajajaja.

I mean seriously. (And english isn't my mother language, so figure it out)

Think that girl was quite in a hurry that she even use her spell check or she was crying because someone left her, who knows

What is the first girl even talking about? Punctuation is a good thing!

HAHAHA........ I don't even know what the first girl was talking about.

I truly do not understand the first one. Mind blown.

Sorry, I meant understand.

Wow, hate mailers have little typing ability. Anybody who writes like this must not be able to unstand the very literate posts on this site. No wonder they hate you! :-)

Wow! Some people really need to retake their English classes! They made no sense what-so-ever!!

Jon Ass? Oh, that's hilarious.

"brainded"
That was funny. XD