(Posted by Kaleb Nation )

Reading Twilight: Chapter 11 (Complications)

May 29th, 2008 at 12:45 am by Kaleb Nation

The song for this chapter is Enemies by Ryan Cabrera

I returned from Alaska on Monday only to find that I was locked out of my house. The apartment people had changed the blasted locks on me, and since it was Memorial Day, I had to sit outside for nearly 2 hours waiting for the maintenance guy to get on over there. This was only bitterly humorous, since it came immediately after The Lasagna Burglar got in and raided my freezer. I cry Injustice!: I pay the rent, but he has an easier time getting in my home.

If I wasn’t out-of-my-mind exhausted, I might have thought to start on the next chapter of Twilight while waiting to be let in. But all thoughts were elsewhere (pondering a quick change of profession to get in my home) so it wasn’t until today that I got to it. But finally on to chapter 11!

I would be partially terrified to be in the same room as Bella with a tennis racket. In fact, if I was Coach Clapp, I might rather prefer she be handed a paper plate taped to the end of a paint stick, in an effort to reduce the weight of the object if it became airborne when she goes flying through the air. After Bella leaves, I’m sure she won’t be the only person who is ‘lightheaded and wobbly’.

It didn’t go smoothly. I somehow managed to hit myself in the head with my racket and clip Mike’s shoulder on the same swing. Then, I clunked Michelle on the back of the head, providing a wonderful concussion, which in the same forward motion over-extended my arm, pulling a muscle, which caused me to swing backwards, providing a graceful set of bruises to Marvin. As I jerked forwards again so as to not fall backwards from the motion, I made a circular swing and knocked three other classmates unconscious, the power of this swoosh causing me to backpedal ferociously, knocking wildly into Harry, Jeremy, Megan, Fiona and Paula, knocking them all out cold. Centrifugal force then caused me to go flying again, slamming the end of the racket into George, Jamie, Tyler, Ashley, Christopher, Minnie, Todd, Shamika, Keisha, Zahra, Shonda, Sabrina, Krista, Daronda, Theresa, and Felicia, among others, before I finally landed at the feet of Coach Clapp.

Honest, officer. That’s what happened.”

The Forks Gazette

The Forks Gazette reports


As for Rosalie’s red convertible and all the guys gathered around it, I can vouch that the scene is quite realistic. Every day, there is a red Mustang in pristine, polished condition parked out in front of the apartment. It is like having a princess in Toadtown: almost every other vehicle in the lot is either scrap-metal, half painted, or belongs to the mail carrier. I am certain that whoever owns this car is sitting up in their apartment window with binoculars, grinning wickedly as they watch guys try to let their turning gazes of admiration go unnoticed.

The Red Convertable

Stephenie also keeps referring to a specific, nameless band in these chapters, but I think it’s pretty easy to guess which one she’s thinking of (added 10:32 AM: forgot to mention: I think the band is Linkin Park). She was smart, though, not to say their name in the book. This lets us imagine almost any band we’d like in their place. I’m curious as to what band you people think would fit for something Bella and Edward would both love. As for me, I’d think they might also be a fan of Anberlin too.

On page 232, I saw the word ‘twilight’ for the first time, just before the chapter ended with one of the Blacks appearing and seeing Edward. I’m getting the feeling that they don’t like each other very much, and I’m almost certain I’m going to be hearing more about this in the next few chapters.


– My five hour college class was so interesting, it flew by and was over in a flash. Not at all what I was expecting. So it obviously isn’t near as loathsome as I thought, and oddly enough my professor looks like a Mel Gibson double. Weird. But the class was awesome and the dread has left me.

– Due to being nearly 3 weeks behind on emails, I have added a FAQ page at the top that will answer some common questions. Sorry if it’s taking me so long to get back! I’ll be replying as soon as I can get to them.

Our friend GJ sent me another email, filled with even more oinking. I am considering posting it. Does anybody want or not want to read more from him?

– Congrats to The Fantastic Twi-Hards youtube for getting listed on Stephenie’s website! I know all too well how it feels to know that Stephenie actually saw something you made. Now, all I need is a link from her site too… though I guess her Myspace mention was golden enough for me 😀 .

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94 Responses

  1. Julie

    Stephenie has said that the band Bella was listening to is Linkin Park. Muse doesn’t come into the books until the 3rd one.

  2. Pam

    Nice selection on the car. That one’s pretty fast and I think Edward would approve.

  3. inmortal


    Snif, I want Rosalie to pimp my ride…. Hale yeah!!! I drive a Chevy but is not a truck LOL.

    Yeah like someone said before, the band is Linkin Park.

    Woah you’re near to chapter 13!!!! YEEEY

  4. patrice

    Mahahahaha, that was too funny! You have to admit, it’s plausible!

  5. Alyssa

    Yeah, I read about her saying Linkin Park too.
    When I read that line about gym class in the book, I laughed out loud…it’s short, but says everything. And nice article to go with it, ha.
    Sorry to hear about the lasagna bugler! That pretty much sucks.
    That’s good about the class being interesting…My hour and twenty classes are hard enough to sit through as it is…
    I like reading your blogs! They’re good. 😀

  6. twilight22lover

    ya, stephenie said it was linkin park. this is most of the reason i love linkin park and listen to it at least like 3 hours a day!!!!!! in fact, i’m listening to linkin park right now!!!!

  7. Renata

    Wow… this is totally amazing!
    Not only yours posts but the book also XD

    I have just discovered this site (I really mean “just”, something of 30 min ago..)

    I’m from Brazil… As a coincidence I’m going to but the book today. It has just arrived in here and it’s been named as a “feaver”.

    I have read the first chapter of Twilight and I’m looking forward to read the next… I’m sort of excited! XDD

    I just wanted to congratulate you… loved your space ^^

    huge kisses from a brazilian girl!


  8. Amanda

    I LOVE Anberlin! My fave. I like to think they were listening to them too. But, like the others said, it was Linkin Park.

  9. Tara

    Haha, I love the gym class thing. I think I like that even better than the “outtake” gym scene Stephenie has on her site!

    Sorry about the Lasagna Burglar, and the lock-change incident. That truly DOES sound like something out of a book/movie.

    Also, you should post what GJ said!

  10. Katie Beth

    Eh, sure, post the stuff from GJ. I’m sure it will be massively entertaining.

    I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Stephenie Meyer has fantastic tastes in music.

  11. Natali

    Stephenie has an outtakes section on her website where she added more from the Gym class incident. I would like to see more from the rude guys because you edit for us, I don’t like the bad language.

  12. marissa

    Ha ha his oinking stupidity was hilarious…I totally want to hear what other stupid things he has to say!

  13. Shelby

    u should definatly post GJ. his opinions are really “interesting”

    please post

  14. Amy

    Of course they listen to Anberlin. Morally upright and yet so very, very angsty, how could a vampire with an existential crisis resist? 😀

    As always, a very fun post to read.

  15. Jen

    I love this site! My friend introduced me to Twilight and this site.

  16. Catherine

    LOL. Yup, I can see Bella doing that. 😉 Hilarious.

  17. Megan

    Fun post. I’ve been following for a while, and this is my first comment. I think it was the mention of anberlin that made me want to comment…. Thinking of Bella liking them makes it easier for me to imagine myself in her place (Oh, how I wish it were true) and I thought it was high time to let you know how much I enjoy Twilight Guy. :)

  18. Tina

    You have to post what GJ said! His last round of oinking made me laugh so hard 😀

  19. Lauren

    Yes, I’m pretty sure it was Linkin Park she was talking about, I think I read it somewhere. Why do you think I got into that band?!?!lol!HAHAHAHA, Bella and gym class = bad for the people around her!lol! I literally started laughing so hard I fell out of my bed when I read that . . . but I’m not that hard to make laugh, so maybe its different for other people, but I laughed a lot!

  20. Andrea

    Lol! Awesome “Freak a Leek” reference!

  21. Hope

    LOVED this entry! You rock, Kaleb!

    By the way, you need to post that email from GJ. Quite amusing, he is.

  22. Katie

    Ahaha I would like to see another email from GJ, but I think if you do post it, it would give him initiative to keep getting more and more annoying…

    And, dude, Anberlin is AMAZING! I think they would be a perfect fit for the series. I finally get to see them live this summer on Warped Tour! Squeeee!!

  23. Stephanie

    Omg! I didn’t know about the Linkin Park thing! I love them! Ome! Omc! I’ve failed my fandom! I must now commit honorable suicide! Goodbye cruel world! ;_;

    Oh, in case you are interested, on Stephenie Meyers website, she has an ‘outtake’ chapter of Bella in gym if it interests you. She has alot of outtakes and such.

  24. A!m31a

    *GASP!* Do you think the Lasagna Burglar could have traveled from Utah down to Texas?? All my freezer food disappeared too!
    … Wait… That was the guys across the hall… Now I remember.
    I’m sorry for your food though! I understand the necessity of freezer food as a college student.
    Keep posting! I love reading them! Twilight is one of the greatest books ever and I hope you enjoy it!!

  25. Ren

    You totally should post what GJ sent. That would be very funny.

  26. Lissete [Frerard Addict]

    Bahaha, you make me fall out of my chair, I’m going to have tie my buttocks to the seat from now on.

    Funny that you mentioned the Lasagna Burglar, my mom just made some today! *gasp*

    Oh and let us hear from GJ! That guy’s stupidity amuses me. ^.^

  27. Morgan A.

    LOL! Bella Swan Injured Entire Gym Class!! I could totally imagine that happening Lol!!

    And yea defenitly post what GJ said, its hilarious!

  28. Jan

    Post it! close-minded pigs are funny.

  29. Annie

    I would love to hear from GJ. And your bella in gym class made me lmao. yes, i did actually laugh it off. almost.
    It actually reminds me of me. I was the only person in my Softball/baseball theory gym class to get hit in the head with a ball. and i almost hit multiple people.
    I think Bella and Edward might also listen to Silverstein or RJA.

  30. Abby

    In the newspaper article, I love the snippet of the “gnomes” underneath the pic! :)

  31. Loonyxoxlovegood

    definitely post the oinking from GJ!
    i loved the post! hilarious!

  32. Kaleb Nation

    whoops, Abby. See, I edited that photo from another one I had made (original headline: http://duncelander.com/ ). Forgot to blur that part 😀

  33. Piper

    lol, Anberlin is a great band.

  34. Rachel

    I think Edward and Bella would listen to Muse too (and of course Anberlin)
    And sure, go ahead and post Gj’s thing, i want to bash him some more..lol!

  35. Faktririjekt

    Yes, please post the email.

    I’d like to read it. :)

  36. Kimberley

    Hey. That was awesome. I think that the two of them would both listen to Muse, Blue October, and maybe a little Micheal Buble thrown in the mix. Loved the pics! You just wait for the next chapter, it’s one of my faves! Billy Black is one of my favorite characters for some reason.

  37. fermina

    I LOVE LINKIN PARK —- my favorite band even before twilight so when i was reading her acknowledgments in the back of one of the books and i saw Link Park i just about died because by then i was so obssed with twilight that i thought it couldnt get any better and —woalahhh linkin park was on there and then on her FAQ thing for twilight she says that it was linkin park and i just about died again because before i thought she was only listening to them while writing the book but now there in there so saweett lol i LOVE ur site

  38. Jennifer

    Eek, Im glad you got to chapter 11 !!

    And Im sorry that you got locked out of your house !! That’s happened to me before :/

    Anyways – I loved your thoughts ! Especially the convertable one !! I hope you get to ch 12 soon !!

  39. Lee

    LOL nice work on the editing hehe. I would suggest posting what GJ said it is pretty funni to read. Keep reading.

  40. Samantha

    Though I don’t think Edward would enjoy it, I catch myself humming Flyleaf songs while reading Twilight.
    However, Coldplay seems to be something they might both enjoy. I agree on the Anberlin point as well.

    Please post GJ’s latest rant: it amuses me so…

  41. Sarah

    It’s saying something if GJ is still reading something he thought was stupid, isn’t it? Please post; I could use a laugh!

    Ah, Linkin Park… Yet another thing I’ve fallen in love with because of Stephenie… I can definitely imagine them listening to it, but Coldpay would work just as well.

    Lasaga thief? The horror! :)

  42. Lari

    Jah, totally post what GJ has recently oinked at you!
    I love how you just add little words, or sentences in. It’s fun to see what you make of things.
    Well that ’tis good you are not totally dreading that class now, it will be easier.
    So sorry about you not being able to get in, that sucks.

  43. frankie

    hehehehe!!!!! Once again you made me laugh until it hurt.

  44. Bella

    Nah its muse – muse is in all the playlists…argh well anything could fit muse/linkin park/coldplay.

  45. Lara

    Kaleb you are a gem. That little scene made me laugh after a very bad morning. I could seriously give you a hug.

    My band pick would be Breaking Benjamin. I think Edward and Bella could agree on them.

  46. Sarah (another one - shocking)

    Doesn’t it suck being locked out of your house? This is one of my favorite chapters (but all of them are favorites to me ;))

    For a band pick, I’m going to go with Simple Plan. I can totally see Edward loving Simple Plan, Bella maybe not as much, though.

  47. jessika

    i think the would both like muse, placebo, or maybe the used

  48. Michelle

    Hey Kaleb –

    There is a link to your site from Stephenie’s site. It’s under Twilight Series/Fansites.

    I love your postings – I’ve been using them to entice my (male) cousin to read the series. Unfortunately, he has a similar reaction to the books as GJ.

  49. Emmi

    haha i either though it was Muse or Linkin Park……haha loved the racket scene 😀
    Love your Entrys Kaleb! Your rock! =]

  50. Staysa

    whilst I am an avid Anberlin fan (Dismantle.Repair. is the best) I think Bella and Edward are more of the New Kids on the Block type.

  51. Kate

    you should definitely post the oink filled email 😛

  52. Nina

    Well, I always thought of Bloc Party as the mentioned band, but this is probably just because I listened to them while reading some passages of the book.

  53. Snow

    LOL! The substitute racket you thought for Bella would be unusable. The tennis ball would just wreck it, haha! Then she wouldn’t be able to play…which is kind of the point you had right? Safety first! hahaha!

    About the mustang. Maybe it’s Rosalie’s. Who knows? She might have bought a new car.

  54. savannah

    the first time they sayy twilight in the book is actually page 139. when bella is debating if edward could possibly be a vampire in her trip up the trail behind her house.
    “… i wanted nothing more than to be with him right now. Even if… but i couldn’t think it. Not here alone in the darkening forest. Not while the rain made it as dim as TWILIGHT under the canopy and pattered like footsteps across the matted earthen floor.”

  55. Edward'sGirl

    Oh my! I love your site!
    I am hooked! It is my Twilight fix! And I just discovered it YESTERDAY! I have soo much to catch up on.
    Thank you!! Keep posting!
    You’re AHHH-MAZ-ING.

    Oh and GJ cracks me up!
    I love it. haha.

  56. Lisa

    Hi Kaleb,

    Seriously, I think I pulled a muscle LMAO at your extended badminton scene along with the headlines.

    My son just rolls his eyes and tells me to get a life even though he’s the one who insisted I read the Saga.

    Your take on the book and all your graphic imaginings like Bella’s truck and Unicorn Charlie are too funny.

    Well done young dude!

    Your site is now part of my daily fix along with TwilightMOMS, of course!

  57. Hannahkin

    Anberlin is a perfect choice :) Along with the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, maybe some Switchfoot, Leeland… Muse… :)

    i’m reading Twilight for the third time, taking it a bit slower now, and this is my favourite quote from Chapter 11 – say you agree with me, make my day! :) it comes from page 194, following Bella and Mike’s dialogue after Gym class.

    ‘ “He looks at you like… like you’re something to eat,” he continued, ignoring me.
    I choked back the hysteria that threatened to explode, but a small giggle managed to get out despite my efforts. He glowered at me. I waved and fled to the locker room.’

  58. Ley Ley

    The sad thing is, when I read the chapters with the CD in them, I was kindof hoping it was Metal, not Linkin Park.
    I thought it was Damageplan or Megadeth or somebody. I was a little disappointed to find out it was just Linkin Park.
    But, eh, that’s what you get when you’re too into Metal. Haha.

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  62. BrooklynBridges

    Yeah, that would be me in gym class. Only instead of knocking everyone else out, i would somehow manage to be in the way of every single ball, and get hit in the head countless times.
    I think i have a ball magnet in my head.
    But that would make an awesome headline. And that makes me laugh because another headline could be “Eddie-boy knocks whole Biology class unconcious before vampirifically devouring Bella Swan” except it dosent have as nice a ring to it.
    Oh, and that makes more sense if you’ve read the bit of Midnight Sun on Smeyers website.

  63. Krista

    Hey, that’s my name! :)

    This is completely random, but where did you get all those names?! You are so funny. XD

  64. Rebekah

    I think Edward and Bella would both be into Switchfoot ( or at least Edward would) because Switchfoot is all about beautiful music and deep messages.

  65. breann12835

    NO!!! You are wrong! The first time the book says twilight is in chapter 7 on page 139 at the bottom of the page. It took me forever to find it so…. I hope you enjoy! 😀 I just wanted you to know that and I'm not trying to be rude like this sounds. So that's where it really is.

  66. breann12835

    NO!!! You are wrong! The first time the book says twilight is in chapter 7 on page 139 at the bottom of the page. It took me forever to find it so…. I hope you enjoy! 😀 I just wanted you to know that and I'm not trying to be rude like this sounds. So that's where it really is.

  67. Mickey Not Mouse

    lol the only flaw with that scenario is that Bella more often then not inflicts injury on her self more then others, if she's taking out all those people you bet she's going to like trip at the end and give herself a concussion! lol! and the whole Blacks and Cullen's hating each other thing will never be the same for me after watching these:



    “Mornin' Hell-beast”
    “Mornin' minor character!”

    lol love it.


  68. Twritebite

    Dude, I think you already are a real twilighter. Who else would make a website devoted to the twilight books, and Stephenie Meyer? It's cool to be a guy twilighter.
    I think it's so funny when Bella dares Edward to eat human food.

  69. Lisa

    Rosailie's convertable is, like, megaly cool!

    Anyways, I'm really enjoying hearing your funny thought on Twilight! Nice job, Kaleb! Like sooooooooooo many other people have said, it is CLASS that you are a guy twilight fan!

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