The song for this chapter is Time After Time by Quietdrive
[audio:https://twilightguy.com/music/timeaftertime.mp3]
Time is a very curious thing, and as school finals are rapidly approaching, my management of it has become of utmost importance. Should I study history for two hours more and government for two hours less? Should I work on my art paper or review 34 of the 85 Federalist Papers? Should I at least open my study notebooks or just continue watching addictive videos involving chinchillas and raisins?
Like Bella, I can’t imagine for the life of me where this year went. Wasn’t it just New Years? Didn’t I just move into this apartment? Sheesh. It is obviously one of those human things: and if time flies for us, how much more so for vampires, who are hardly affected by it?
I can see in this how Bella is indecisive. She wants to become a vampire, and join Edward for eternity — but at the same time, she is suddenly realizing the eternal consequences of making that choice. How will it feel to be eternal, where time hardly affects you, and to have the same strengths and new weaknesses that vampires have? How will it feel to know that this is something irreversible: that once she makes this choice, she can’t go back? Bella’s feelings are seen most in these lines:
I knew exactly what I wanted, but I was suddenly terrified of getting it.
In theory, I was anxious, even eager to trade mortality for immortality. […But] In practice… being human was all I knew. The future beyond that was a big, dark abyss that I couldn’t know until I leaped into it.
This is the reason why when people fervently ask me if I’d like to become a vampire, I hesitate with my answer. Like Bella, I have a fear of the irreversible. I’m not the type of person who would get a tattoo, not because I particularly abhor ink, but simply because I know that immediately afterward I will regret it and eternally grumble that I shouldn’t have done something that could not (easily) be removed.
Similarly, if I was to be turned into a vampire, there is literally no way of reversing the process. Even though I might be amazingly fast, have gigantic muscles and every person on the planet admiring every inch of my sparkly skin, I still might long to be human, and not have any possibility of it happening. Everyone knows just how much Bella wants to join Edward — the fear of becoming a vampire for eternity is obviously strong to make her hesitate in her decision. As Bella said: it is a big, dark abyss — how do you prepare for that type of decision?
As for Alice, Christmas must be impossible around her, and if I was one of her siblings I might just get something and throw it at her days early, since there’s absolutely no point in wasting time to wrap the gifts.
The unfortunate thing, however, is that for some reason she can’t see who is causing all this trouble in Seattle. Obviously, this newborn vampire problem is getting bigger. Usually, I can read what is going on but this time I can’t decipher exactly who this is. My thoughts are that it’s someone from the Volturi trying to cause trouble; Victoria; or even maybe a fourth member of her vampire coven: some member I have yet to meet.
But I keep wondering what the reason is. Are they killing these people to draw the Cullens out into the open? Or perhaps are they trying to incite a war between the werewolves and the vampires, by making it appear that the Cullens are attacking people against the rules of the treaty? I have little doubt that Jacob and the werewolves will soon be involved in this conflict — now the question for me is which side they will be fighting on.
Question for the comments: would you hesitate becoming a vampire because of how eternal your decision would be, or try to change as quickly and as soon as possible to avoid humanly dangers?
——NOTES——
– As the next two weeks are finals at school, I will probably not be posting as often or as lengthily as usual. However, immediately after I will be back as usual, until Christmas takes over 😀
– The Twilight Youtube Contest Of Awesome will end this Friday at 11:59 PM CST. Be sure to get your entries in before it’s too late!
120 Responses
If I were in the same situation as Bella, I’d definately want to be a vampire. I wouldn’t want to be changed for a while, though. I know myself, and I know I’d keep putting it off until it was necessary. I probably wouldn’t even bring up the subject until I got brave enough, or I was dying or something. I wouldn’t want to know Edward’s opinion. I would be afraid he’d get upset or something, and I would be too afraid that he’d want to change me right then or something. I know I’d wait until the last minute to ask. I’m a procrastinator. Tehe 🙂
Well, on second thought, I’m not sure. I wouldn’t want to get old and have a boyfriend who was 17. I would definately want to be a vampire, but it sort of goes against my beliefs. I’m not sure if vampires have souls. But it’s hard to believe that someone as good as Carlisle doesn’t. So maybe the good vampires have souls…I’m not sure. And I really wouldn’t want to live forever. It’s a long time to live. Sure, being strong and fast and beautiful, but it’d be tiring to live so long. It would be a very big descision to make. So now I’m undecided.
Like Edward says to Bella, that he doesnt want her to change because she is afraid. I would wait until the danger is over, plus, from what Bella has heard about newborn vampires, having one around wouldnt be helpful, ecspecially if it turns into a war.
Do you know how hard it is to answer these without giving anything away?!
I already know what happens, and i feel kind of silly trying to pretend like i dont.
I wouldn’t hesitate one bit. My human life is a disaster and being a vampire would be awesome! I wouldn’t regret it later either.
As much as I love the series, I would never consider becoming a vampire myself. Even the idea of thirsting for human blood- possibly my friends, family, etc.- is simply repulsive to me. I can’t imagine wanting the blood of people I love…. and yet I also couldn’t stand to be away from them. I would never consider leaving my friends and family for eternity, even if (dare I say) there was someone like Edward I could leave them for.
I would, at the very least, give it a few years’ time to REALLY think about it. I would hate making a decision that would quite literally affect my life for all eternity.
I almost entirely agree with Charlee up there^^. Bella’s choice is justfied because she has this die-hard reason to. Living as a vampire would become lonely would it not..I mean sure it’d be super cool and thrilling ..but who would you come home to or what would you look forward to. The Cullens are family-based vampires so at least they have others who share their striking phenomenon of life with. Thats a BIG help I’m sure. And without hesitation I must say in harmony with other twilight-based-fan-lives, if I had my own Edward to fight for, shoot I’d be down and dirty to become a bloodthirsty crit. AHHA–but I’d still try to keep some form of contact with my “human” friends/family of course just as Bella. And whats funny is if I REALLY were Bella like I dream about in my dreams(lmao) then I’m positive I’d end up doing everything she did: I’d defend my family with my life and I’d put other people’s feelings before my own, and become totally consumed by this danger/excitement thats thrown my way, and be a total clumsy-life-threatening magnet who jumps at the thought of being with the 😉 perfect man…;)
It basically turns into the question that the movie promotes: If you could live forever, what would you live for?
What is forever without someone to share it with? <3
I’m the same as you are Kaleb. I usually don’t like making decisions that can’t be un-done.
I’ve been thinking about this vampire issue a lot lately, what with surrounding myself in all things vampire, it was sure to cross over into my dreams. My reasoning may just be the stupidest yet, but I’m afraid enough of dying that I wouldn’t mind to live forever. Not the Cullen way, at least. To become an uncontrollable monster who eats people all the time doesn’t exactly pique my interest. The strength, the knowledge you would inevitably come upon over the years, and the fact that your chances of meeting your true soul mate go up considerably are all fantastic notions. I’ve really experienced all the human things I was looking for out of life. My only drawback is that I’d like to lose some weight before my body got stuck forever, unchanging. After that, I’d totally be up for it!
I would never become a vampire ’cause I’m a vegetarian and would never be able to kill an animal (and don’t particualy want to kill humans either). But even if I took the whole blood drinking out of the equation I’m not really sure if I’d be able to go through with it or not.
That’s tricky…
It depends on the scenario,
if they asked Would you become a vampire and spend eternity with Edward? I would say yes so fast they wouldn’t even finish the question! But, if they just asked if I would become a vampire? I would have to think!
I wouldn't be rushing into becoming a vampire because I would want to spend more time with loved ones, get a good length of time to feel like my goodbye was real. At the same time eat all the food i can lol . (myself in bellas place) I already know Edward is going to love me forever and ever and I”m going to spend an eternity with him..I know he is going to be protecting me (as well as his family) so I could enjoy a few more years being human and then finally be Edwards forever !! :p
I wouldn't be rushing into becoming a vampire because I would want to spend more time with loved ones, get a good length of time to feel like my goodbye was real. At the same time eat all the food i can lol . (myself in bellas place) I already know Edward is going to love me forever and ever and I”m going to spend an eternity with him..I know he is going to be protecting me (as well as his family) so I could enjoy a few more years being human and then finally be Edwards forever !! :p
I'd most definitely have to say no…I would not like to become immortal in any shape or form… I'm far too stoked on becoming a crazy old cat lady.
If you get just into it it's all like 'Oh being a vampire is cool and I get to be all those great things' BUT if you think into it a little deeper, I'd say 'Oh no man, first drain me. I WILL not change.” Because well, it must be so hard to live for so long. watching everything change, people you love dying and not being able to change yourself. Frustrating, really.
I wouldn't because my husband, a pastor in a Lutheran church, has informed me that he is obligated to hunt and destroy all undead creatures, especially vampires. Consequently, he really doesn't like it when I call him “My Edward”….
I've asked myself the same question a couple of weeks ago and drew a little comic strip about it which you can see here: http://jengambale.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d2wtzc7
🙂
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